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  • Contemplating Divorce?

    I need a little advice, my husband and I have been married 6 yrs and have known each other for 20. He was single all his life until late 40's, I had been married before, my children are grown and out of the house, and he has none. My question is, I have been thinking about divorce because this relationship is stressful to me, we have went over these issues many times and nothing changes, we built a house right before getting married and it has always seemed like his house and not mine, he paid for it. I feel I must get permission for everything. He dosent want me hanging curtains due to nails in the walls (we have all blinds), he has threw a fit tonight over me bringing home 2 lamps he didnt like. He has a bad temper but never directly at me, I will hear him go outside and scream and yell about things. Little things that wouldnt even annoy most people (he needs Ativan !) We live like old people even though I am only 43 and he 50. He never french kisses me unless we are having sex, we only have sex about 4 times a month, I feel his testosterone is low (lack of desire and energy on his part) he has promised to go to the doctor many times but never does, he never takes me anywhere but out to eat, if we go anywhere it is my idea. We dont like the same music or activities so I go by myself or with a female friend, I have been to Vegas, and many places by myself, he is very devoted to his job, and is an honest good man and he has a nice nest egg, I earn a good salary as a nurse but for 2 yrs now have had fibromyalgia and athritis and hurt alot and it is hard to work like I do. But there is no fun, no passion, no excitement, no passionate kisses, no trips with him, no nothing in my life, I have my own hobbies and I do them alone, I am fun and outgoing and he is an introvert. I do want to waste the rest of my youth, I do love him but no longer like I should. I am afraid of what if I get disabled because of the fibro and just scared for my future if I left, I know I would get something from the 401K, ESOP, equity in the home. If he would just try it could be saved but he has promised to for 6 yrs now and never follows through more than a week. The stress is worse for my fibro. I cry at times because I feel married and so alone as well. Should I stay for my long term future or leave . I never thought I would take for granted simple things like being able to do what I wanted like hang curtains, paint a wall or whatever.

    5 AnswersMarriage & Divorce8 years ago
  • Is selling on e-bay really worth the hassle?

    I have a ton of stuff I would like to sell on e-bay and maybe have an e-bay store. Is it really worth the hassle of photographing all the stuff and putting it up online? Has anyone had great success with this or do the fees and shipping and all outweigh the profit, time and hassle?

    2 AnswersBuying & Selling9 years ago
  • Can you use a mini storage rental to put a car in and work on it?

    I have never rented a mini storage building but need some where out of the cold to put the doors back together after painting my car. Does anyone know if they specifiy what you cant put in the building (all legal stuff I know), but I want to go there in a climate controlled unit to work on my car, does anyone know if they allow that or has anyone used one for that purpose? Also whats a ball park figure on a unit and do they come with lights inside them?

    5 AnswersBuying & Selling9 years ago
  • What should I do about my marriage?

    I have been married almost 5 yrs. I feel like one of the lonliest married people alive. When we were dating, my husband and I went places together, had alot of sex and spent quality time when we could even though we both worked full time. I feel my husband cares most about material things. He built a nice home that was "for me" but I cannot even have the furniture I want in the house and have gotten yelled at over minor things about the house. I feel I need sex at least 3 times a week as I am only 40. He only wants to about once a week and we share nothing much in common now, I go most all places and take trips by myself, we do go out to eat sometimes. I long to go out someplace nice, dancing, concerts, play chess, camping, anything!!! other than our honeymoon, we have not even taken a vacation in 4 yrs. I cant love him like I should because he spends no time with me much. He dosent care if he looks attractive for mo or not it seems, and most of the time I have to approach him sexually. I go take trips by myself because he dosent want to go, he dosent like rock music (but bluegrass!) he likes talk radio, dosent like shopping, flea markets, anything that I like, he is mostly good to me but quite grumpy at times and does tell me he loves me and does do things for me. He is not passionate with me but bland and it hurts me that I at least feel like I have to beg him sexually. I have talked with him about all these things multiple times and he says he will change, he does for a week and its back to the same. I am so desperate for some real affection (he will not french kiss me unless we are having sex or I do it first), he doesnt care about my needs I feel. I have been so tempted with a quick affair just to feel human again. I even told him that I was lonley and horny and those were a bad combination, he said he would do better but nothings changed. I am not unattractive, just the opposite, he talks about loving having a "hot wife". But I feel he only cares about the house and 401K, ect. we have needed things and this house and all that comes before I feel like, the house is in his name only, I still carry my ex-husbands last name (in school and planned to change it after done so as to avoid alot of hassle), he has health insurance provided by work, I have none, in other words, there is nothing here he can offer me that I cant do for myself, especially affection and passion, and love & intimacy & a partner, thats what I am after. If he will not or cannot give me what I need, I may have to get it for myself as well. I have known him for yrs though and do not want to hurt him and also dont want another divorce, but I feel there is no joy, no excitement, fun or real happiness in my life. Something I could change whether another man was in it or not. I cant stand feeling like I am around as an arm piece for christmas parties and occassional dates, and an occassional piece of *** when he is ready. I have grown to resent the house that costs alot in mortgage that we cant even do things because of the costs. I pay for our dinner often , mean while he has a credit card (with no balance) and close to 100K in 401K , equity in our house, alll I am saying is I dont know why I am here and I feel miserable. Am I justified if I seek a divorce and how can I do it without hurting him.?

    7 AnswersMarriage & Divorce9 years ago
  • Am I wrong to feel kinda hurt?

    My daughter graduated high school and I sent invitations to all her aunts and uncles and they are all local and I have good relationships with them all and have helped them all at different times, I understand graduations can be boring, but she didnt even get a card, gift or anything from anyone but her grandparents and her parents and my best friend. Other kids in the family they seem to do everything for but neither of mine, I feel there should be no favoritism, my daughter noticed it too, she didnt seem as bothered but she is not the kind to show stuff. I even asked one if she got her invitation just to make sure and she said yes and just left it at that. You know I know times are tough but a card or even 5 or 10 dollars isnt going to break these people,,trust me. I want to post something about it on my facebook or something to get rid of the anger but dont know what to do, anyone have any ideas?

    3 AnswersFriends1 decade ago
  • This question is for bodybuilders only. How do I modify my diet as now I am going to 12hr night shift? ?

    On night shift my body gets confused and wants to eat both day & night. I sleep from about 8am-1pm then try to nap again from 4-6pm or sometimes sleep all through from 8am-5pm and work from 7pm-7am. Then on my days off I have to go back to trying to sleep normally at night, all this wreaks havoc on my diet and sleep pattern, do you have any ideas about how to change diet to night shift (and not want to eat all night long) I think I want to do this as it helps keep me awake!

    16 AnswersDiet & Fitness1 decade ago
  • Sunni & Sheite Islams?

    What are the difference between Sunni & Sheite Muslims? How did this difference come about? Is it true they dont like each other, what are their beliefs?

    3 AnswersReligion & Spirituality1 decade ago
  • What (if any) are the signifigant changes in the religions of Islam, Christianity & Buddhaism since founders?

    I need to know in the 500 yrs following the death of the founders of these religions, what have the changes been, and are they signifigant changes or not? Also, how do each view women and how are these religions similar? (or not) Answer only if you have knowledge on these religions.

    2 AnswersReligion & Spirituality1 decade ago
  • Ready for divorce?

    I have only been married a year and am unhappy alot in my marriage. We are 10yrs apart in age, and I knew him for a long time but never lived with him until we got married. My husband is a good man and loves me alot, I had came out of a bad relationship and had been hurt, my husband just would not give up on me. I decided he would never hurt me and was a good man and financially secure (even though I was independant and made decent money) The problem is I am not very attracted to him physically, and sexually I could take it or leave it, this is different from passion that I had with others, there is none, I have told him this several times, tried to show him, he also acts much older and wont do things with me. I like rock, he likes blugrass! (yuck) we dont have any fun and are so different, he does love me alot and it would hurt him so bad if I left, but I need passion in my life and dont want to do something I will regret. He built us a nice home, the security is nice, is it enough?

    4 AnswersMarriage & Divorce1 decade ago
  • How to quit without giving a notice?

    I am really unhappy with my job. I am the only employee, and I now feel so unhappy driving to work every day. I told my boss on two seperate occassions, he may want to hire someone because I would be leaving in about a month, he asked me if I wanted to go down to a couple days a week and I said yes, that would be okay, but now I dont even want to go back. I am a nurse and was hired for my knowledge and was to be talking to medical offices about our health products and run the office. There were to be two nurses in the office, the other one quit and he has never replaced her, my "to do list" started out with 12 weekly things and is now up to 22, including things like, putting together water systems, taking out garbage, emptying dishwasher, and he wrote me a list of things I have said, and the proper word usage! We are in the deep south & we dont sound like total hicks, but he is not from here, it was humiliating & he suggested I carry a tape recorder and talk into it.

    9 AnswersEtiquette1 decade ago
  • Child support after 18?

    Does anyone know Va. law regarding if child support will continue after my daughter starts college? This was 1990 when we divorced and there is nothing in the papers about it. We didnt make an agree ment on it, she will turn 18 in 2008

    15 AnswersMarriage & Divorce1 decade ago
  • Are shoulder pads a no-no?

    I bought a womens suit jacket today at a consignment store, I love it but it has shoulder pads inside that I cant get to, are jackets with shoulder pads still in style or o 80s?

    14 AnswersFashion & Accessories1 decade ago
  • How do I break this skiddish horse?

    I bought a horse off a guy I know and he said he took her back from someone because she abused her. Well, he rode her for me to shw me she will let you ride her, now that I have her, she is so skiddish it took me two days to get her to let me pet her (had to bribe her with grain) I finally got the lead on her today and she pulled away so hard she is not in the field with the lead on. I have been seeing her, feeding her & talking to her everyday to build her trust, but I cant get her not to bolt so I can brush her and build a trust so in time I can ride her, it should be easier to cathch her now that she has lead rope on her but how do I catch her and get her to the point I can ride her, especially if she wont let me get close? This is my first horse. And dont answer this if you dont have horses (or never have)or know anything about them.

    5 AnswersOther - Pets1 decade ago
  • Any of you think of ex boyfriend/girlfriend during sex?

    I still find myself thinking about my ex boyfriend alot (usually daily) even though he turned out to be a total jerk, he was the best sexual partner I ever had and it he turned me on like no other, he is remarried & so am I and we havent been married long. My hisband is a wonderful man but isnt too hot in bed, and I have tried to show him what I like but he is not as verbal as my ex either & he is 46 so probably never will, be. I think of my ex sometimes when we are having sex. Sometimes I think crazy stuff like I would throw it all away just to have that passion (mindblowing) that I had with ex. Anyone ever been through this? Does it ever go away? I have not been turned on by anyone since him nearly as much (very little as a matter of fact. Me & x were spontanious, loved to do it when it hit us, my hubby is reserved & well kinda boring, help!

  • What kind of man is this?

    What do you make of this? A man who was very good to you the first six months then you find out what kind of person he really is in that he is jealous and possesive, doesnt want anyone to look at you, always talks about $ and tells you he can tell what kind of work a woman does by the way she dresses, you find he has a history of not breaking up with women but treating them so badly (critical, accusatory, belittling them) that they will break up with him, blames the women as to why the relationship failed, makes statements like "I refuse to be alone" "I will just go out and find someone to use temporarily to be happy" "Heavy set women are easy to get" "I dont expect anyone to trust me" "If I go to the bar, I never leave emptyhanded" "I used to be a sick minded person, I would leave one's house and go to anothers but I decided to change" and always bragging , he cheated and marries 2 mo. later a girl who is heavy with $ she has same ring he gave 3 others. He met most women in bars.

    16 AnswersSingles & Dating1 decade ago
  • Should I just forget about it or what?

    I have been e-mailing someone I consider a friend for over a year, I liked her from the start, it is my ex boyfriend's mom. She would always send me funny e-mails and such and we talked about different things, he ended up doing me very dirty and we even discussed that as she did not approve, she has been sick lately and wrote and told me, I have not heard from her since and have e-mailed her twice to see how she is but have not heard from her, I dont know if she just doesnt want to talk anymore and doesnt want to tell me or if she is worse or because of him and things he may have said about me, should I now just leave it alone? It hurts my feelings that she wouldnt have the nerve to say so if that is the case as I have always sent her something at Christmas and cared for her as a person, and thought she did me also.

    5 AnswersFriends1 decade ago
  • How can I avoid getting my feelings hurt if my friends dont treat me like I treat them?

    I may expect to much from people but most people, even friends act to busy to call or come around. I try to stay in touch with my friends but I feel like I am the one doing most of the calling and wanting to get together, people always talk about how busy they are but my life is just as busy and I still yet find time for them, I feel I am a true blue friend and expect the same, but find it rarely, except if they really need something, they can always find time to call. It makes you just want to stay to yourself, Anoyone else have this problem? And why does it bother me so much? How do I avoid feeling it?

    8 AnswersFriends1 decade ago
  • Do you know men who have married for a home or money?

    Men do it to. Were you ever dumped for someone that married for money, even a small amount, or to have a house and what was the out come of the marriage? How do people live without the love?

    9 AnswersMarriage & Divorce1 decade ago