I really can't afford a psychologist, I'm a grad' student and my scholarship is about to run out so i should be putting money aside for while i'm writing up. But i need some help or i'm going to end up not finishing at all and on a disability pension like my brother.
I'm onto my fourth psychologist this year. The first two were referrals from my family doctor who were absolute weirdoes and made me feel uncomfortable straight away by the first or second session, i just knew it wasn't going to work with them.
The third tried to treat me for anxiety but was really fixated on exposure, so i just got wrapped up in being anxious about that, it honestly made me worse, things that never bothered me before got scary because i got wrapped up in thinking about how scary they were.
The fourth (the current one) had some good evidenced-based stuff on her website (ACT, mindfulness, etc.) but, by the third or fourth session with her, it felt like we were still taking a history. I asked what were we going to do and she said "i'm not here to give you advice". But i can't tell what she IS there for?
To her therapy seems to be just a "place to talk". I can see how that might help some people who find it hard to talk to people or don't have anyone else to talk to, people who start lots of things with "doc, i've never told this to anyone before..."? But i have two or three really close friend who i can tell anything. I find it way easier to talk to my friends than a psychologist, and i can do it for the price of a cup of coffee, or for free. They listen to me, and i listen to them, it's part of a healthy relationship. Pure talk psychology seems like some sort of prostitution, paying a fortune for something that's normally part of a reciprocal relationship. I have nothing against sex workers, i don't mean it as a slur, just i don't think i need to buy something that i'm getting for free as part of my relationships?
Is there some benefit of a professional that makes it worth it? is there some way i can get more out of this?
I'm willing to persist with the talk therapy if it's worth it, i can find the money if i have to, but is it actually any use, or just a huge waste of a lot of $2 minutes?