• Could this mean my parents are racist?

    Im 17. Ive been dating my current girlfriend for 2 years. She is black and my family is white. My parents have made the two years extremely difficult by preventing me from seeing her for reasons that are just petty and shouldn't matter. Even on her birthday they waited until I was going to go to her house... show more
    Im 17. Ive been dating my current girlfriend for 2 years. She is black and my family is white. My parents have made the two years extremely difficult by preventing me from seeing her for reasons that are just petty and shouldn't matter. Even on her birthday they waited until I was going to go to her house and then gave me a bunch of work to do and threatened to cancel my phone so I couldn't talk to her and not let me see her anymore if I didnt stay home and do the work instead. I have dated other white girls before and they never had a problem and never stopped me from seeing one of them even though one of them was pretty disrespectful to my siblings amd family. My current girlfriend is so sweet tomy younger siblings and aactually plays with them too when shes at my house. Im starting to really wonder why my parents would get in the way and prevent me from hanging out with someone who is so kind and respectful when they never did that to the white girls I dated before who weren't very nice OR respectful. Side note: my four year old brother once said he didnt like someone because of their skin color but he was too young to think about that himself. I imagine he wouldve had to hear that somewhere and that was before he was in preschool or exposed to much other than family business. What do you think? Is this possibly a sign that my parents are racist?
    19 answers · 19 hours ago
  • My mum's boyfriend is staying the night and I'm really scared?

    Best answer: He sounds inappropriate at best, and I would lean towards sinister at this point, until proven otherwise, for the sake of you guys' safety. Some random grown man that your mom happens to have been dating for a few months has no business touching you, let alone repeatedly bear hugging you. It's possible... show more
    Best answer: He sounds inappropriate at best, and I would lean towards sinister at this point, until proven otherwise, for the sake of you guys' safety. Some random grown man that your mom happens to have been dating for a few months has no business touching you, let alone repeatedly bear hugging you. It's possible he's just socially and emotionally clueless about it and has no bad intentions, but you CANNOT risk making that assumption when he's going to be staying overnight in your house. There's no end of cases of kids who've been hurt by the mom's boyfriend.

    It's extremely important for all people to know not to ignore their intuition about potential danger. You hear far too many stories about crime victims who had a gut feeling about something but chose to just play it off instead of taking precautions, because they thought they were just imagining things or being dramatic, or didn't want to cause a scene, etc.

    So make sure the door to your room stays locked all night, and if it's the typical inner door lock that can be easily picked with a coat hanger, then you have to prop a chair against it or push your dresser in front of it or something so that you'll at least wake up from the noise if someone tries to get in. You could put a door stop/wedge under it too, but with any of those, they'll eventually slide across the floor if someone's determined to get in. Test it out first and make sure it'll be a good deterrent.

    Keep a phone in the room, and some weapons. And not a baseball bat or a hammer, because unless you're pretty strong and fast compared to a grown man, it won't be much help, because unless you got him real hard in the head, he'd just take the bat away. I'd say longish knives and the element of surprise would be a better bet, meaning don't let an attacker see it coming; then run away screaming, or else finish the job, if necessary. And don't go out to use the bathroom that night without a knife.

    But that's like worst case scenario stuff, and I don't want to turn something that may have just been a well meaning but inappropriate attempt to make friends, into a horror movie paranoia. It may turn out he's a decent guy, but like anyone else, it takes years to build trust.

    In the meantime, don't get within touching distance of him and keep some furniture between you. If he keeps looking like he wants to close the distance to grab you again, then that's a pretty strong indicator of what he's after, and you should state politely but in no uncertain terms that you don't want him touching you, however you want to phrase it. If he then tries to turn it around and lay the blame on you for being "unfriendly" or whatever, then that's another cause for suspicion, because what he should say, is "okay, sorry."
    10 answers · 11 hours ago
  • What to do if I hate my sister?

    Im 15 year old, my sister is 23. She was always the better one, she had good grades, she goes to the university. I was always little ambitious kid that cared more about famiy and beauty (I want to become a makeup artist) not about grades. I hate her because she always tears me down, tells me that im worthless... show more
    Im 15 year old, my sister is 23. She was always the better one, she had good grades, she goes to the university. I was always little ambitious kid that cared more about famiy and beauty (I want to become a makeup artist) not about grades. I hate her because she always tears me down, tells me that im worthless child. Since I was little she caused so much stress in my life. I am the sensitive one so I always cared what she thought about me. Our flights still sometimes end up with bruises and scratches. I thought that we grown out of this stuff but I think were not. She still tells me to shut up, that im powerless child, that Im going to be nothing in the future, that im peace of **** and more. I really care about her still cause she sometimes is really funny and clever. But I dont think that I can live with sister like this. I really don t know how to deal with this... My parents tells me that im the problem(I guess they love her more)
    41 answers · 3 days ago
  • Mom expecting half of my paycheck?

    My mom is expecting half of my paycheck. Am I selfish for not wanting to give it to her anymore? Here's my situation: I just got my first paying job a couple of months ago. I work minimum wage, so I'm not left with a whole lot after taxes. My mom is currently unemployed, has been for the past few years.... show more
    My mom is expecting half of my paycheck. Am I selfish for not wanting to give it to her anymore? Here's my situation: I just got my first paying job a couple of months ago. I work minimum wage, so I'm not left with a whole lot after taxes. My mom is currently unemployed, has been for the past few years. We just moved here so my brother and I got a job to help pay the bills, but now that my brother and I pay for everything she doesn't really feel the need to go out and get a job. I didn't mind splitting the bills with my brother, but I started to get really frustrated after a few months, especially when I'd come home late at night and she didn't make dinner or go grocery shopping or anything really. I pay her rent, utilities, car payments, car insurance, gas, food... I spend the majority of my time at my boyfriends house and plan on moving in with him. Only problem is my mom isn't looking for a job. I told her how I felt and how I can't put a dime away and she responds by telling me that I'm so ungrateful and a terrible daughter. In the past 4 months I've managed to save $200. How am I supposed to start my life if I'm paying for her to live hers? What bothers me the most is that she's not even trying to find a job, I'm so frustrated with the situation. Should I feel guilty for wanting to move out and stop paying her bills? I was thinking about moving out and giving her a couple of months to find a job. Any ideas?
    60 answers · 3 days ago
  • Why does my mum always cook rubbish meals?

    Best answer: Hmm! Did she work at some horrible fast food joint?
    Best answer: Hmm! Did she work at some horrible fast food joint?
    38 answers · 3 days ago
  • Family wedding jealousy?

    My husband and I got married two years ago. His mother and stepfather offered to help pay for some of the wedding because my family was it very much involved. It was a very nice wedding very small and very personal. Having a grand total of MAYBE $1200. Which I must add I was very thankful for, in no way am I... show more
    My husband and I got married two years ago. His mother and stepfather offered to help pay for some of the wedding because my family was it very much involved. It was a very nice wedding very small and very personal. Having a grand total of MAYBE $1200. Which I must add I was very thankful for, in no way am I ignoring the fact that they helped us with that when they didn't have to. Now my husband's younger stepbrother is getting married to a girl he's barely been with, and my husband's mother and stepfather are cashing out for the wedding. The wedding will have a budget of around 20 grand. Again I loved my wedding I think it was great and it was the happiest day of my life, but I can't get over this jealousy. My husband's mother is constantly talking about how she is so excited that Ashley is joining the family. I just feel like the same excitement wasn't given to me. I'm not saying I don't like Ashley because I do, i'm not saying I wish they gave us more. I simply don't understand why I'm so jealous, because I loved my wedding, but deep down inside I just can't get over the jealousy. Someone please help me try and work through this or explain to me how I can feel little bit better about this
    16 answers · 2 days ago
  • Do all women like to have sex?

    my wife dislikes it
    my wife dislikes it
    105 answers · 5 days ago
  • I caught my 15 year old daughter with her 16 year old boyfriend in bed. How do I handle this?

    I thought my daughter was the daughter I wanted. She gets good grades, stays out of trouble... but I went to her room to tell her and her boyfriend that dinner is ready, and there she was laid on top of him while he had his shirt off! I immediately told him to get out and I have banned him from seeing her. What can... show more
    I thought my daughter was the daughter I wanted. She gets good grades, stays out of trouble... but I went to her room to tell her and her boyfriend that dinner is ready, and there she was laid on top of him while he had his shirt off! I immediately told him to get out and I have banned him from seeing her. What can I do if she rebels and I catch them again?
    12 answers · 14 hours ago
  • Why is my sister so snotty and rude?

    Best answer: It's probably because for some reason or another, your parents favored her, and thus after many times of this, she feels compelled to treat people like ****. It's sad, but true. Many people who grow up with parents who spoil them, for whatever reason, grow up to be spoiled losers, incidently, often ones... show more
    Best answer: It's probably because for some reason or another, your parents favored her, and thus after many times of this, she feels compelled to treat people like ****. It's sad, but true. Many people who grow up with parents who spoil them, for whatever reason, grow up to be spoiled losers, incidently, often ones that do things like divorcing and abuse their spouses or other family members.

    Your parents probably have favored her over the years due to some good quality that she has, or something "recognizable." Another possibility is your sister having things in common with your parents.

    Most likely, she was a spoiled brat that feels compelled to treat people horribly due to "pride," as it says in scripture. She probably has pride for things like being "perfect" in school, for example. Or maybe she has pride in things like "music." Who really gives a ****, right? Helping the poor and doing good deeds is how one should be recognized, not for things that don't help other people that much, or at all.

    As it says in scripture (read Isaiah), woe unto those women who walk out with stretched forth necks, and make a walking and tincing of their feet as they go." God also warns about too much pride of ANYONE, ESPECIALLY the daughters of Zion. She is probably another typical false Christian daughter of Zion that departed from the twelve tribes of Judah that doesn't know God.

    But regardless on the cause of her being spoiled, don't let it get to you. Pray always, follow God, read scripture, meditate on the righteousness of The Lord, and treat your enemies with kindness. Kill your sister with kindness when you are with her, and try to ignore her at all costs. The only way she can learn to not be such a bratty ***** is losing friends and family because of how she treats people. If you don't want to do this, visit your sister, but don't say much to her nor engage in her negativity. This will really show her who's righteous, and believe me, she will feel guilty if you do this enough.

    I hope this helped, and best of luck with your sister!

    Max
    14 answers · 1 day ago
  • I set my parents house on fire by accident and it burned down. They are on vacation. Do I call them?

    Best answer: Just pretend you don't know anything about it.
    Best answer: Just pretend you don't know anything about it.
    11 answers · 17 hours ago
  • Any step dads willing to help on this situation??

    I (mom of daughter) got with my my husband when my daughter was 9 months old. He has completely made her his own daughter which is amazing however she still sees her bio dad about 2 times a year and when she is home is telling both of us how she prefers her "other daddy" and she wants to be with him.. I... show more
    I (mom of daughter) got with my my husband when my daughter was 9 months old. He has completely made her his own daughter which is amazing however she still sees her bio dad about 2 times a year and when she is home is telling both of us how she prefers her "other daddy" and she wants to be with him.. I understand that he is her bio dad is her dad (He moved away and rarely calls or makes time for her and when he does this cycle starts over) So to any step dads out there how did you deal with the child constantly telling you that they prefer their other dad..I am here because my husband is left hurt everyday because of this I do not know how to help him....if any one is willing to share how they dealt with this please help me. I am sorry to say the words step dad because I know that in so many cases the " step dad" is the hardest trying person out there for the child. And goes above and beyond for there kids no matter if they have the same blood or not.
    5 answers · 2 days ago
  • I want to get marry, I would like to have a baby. And make my own life :)?

    Best answer: I expect you will one day. remember that everything has advantages and disadvantages! Please wait for (or seek even) that right person/time. Make sure that you have come to know your adult self well enough to be able to be a great partner and parent! People fall madly in love, thinking (feeling rather) that it... show more
    Best answer: I expect you will one day. remember that everything has advantages and disadvantages!

    Please wait for (or seek even) that right person/time. Make sure that you have come to know your adult self well enough to be able to be a great partner and parent!

    People fall madly in love, thinking (feeling rather) that it will last forever and is enough for a serious relationship. However, it’s very hard to live on an emotional high for very long. Eventually we start to come down from the ecstasy, excitement, strong passions and desires, typically after around 18 months to three years (people vary of course). If couples are friends, discuss their mutual values, shared ambitions, interests, etc., in some depth (obviously there will be some differences, which help make relationships interesting), and make plans, work on their personal development, etc., this can develop into a long and wonderful relationship. If one party feels insecure or low in self respect, it can make for a difficult partnership. It's easy to behave at our best when in love, but marriage, for example, requires a lot of self discipline, sacrifice, compromise and flexibility. If a strong friendship is not in place, the relationship will probably peter out eventually - or worse. Quite often we fall in love because we are lonely and allow ourselves to be won over by anyone who takes an interest in us. Thus we give away control to somebody else if we are not careful. This is another reason for taking things very slowly, and really getting to know someone before committing ourselves or getting too emotionally or sexually involved. Sex can be emotionally bonding, which is disastrous if the other things are not there: strong friendship, similar values and standards, common interests, etc.
    10 answers · 17 hours ago
  • My Dad feels he contributed to his father's suicide in 1975 since my Dad had been expelled from a school. Is this likely true?

    Best answer: Not only is this false, it's absurd. Stop and think! If it was possible for a teen's brain fart to cause a parent to commit suicide, there wouldn't be any 18 year olds left with parents still alive! If your grandad said something in his suicide note blaming your dad, this just shows how whacked out... show more
    Best answer: Not only is this false, it's absurd. Stop and think! If it was possible for a teen's brain fart to cause a parent to commit suicide, there wouldn't be any 18 year olds left with parents still alive! If your grandad said something in his suicide note blaming your dad, this just shows how whacked out he was.

    So your mom and your aunts are morons if they've ever expressed the belief your dad caused this. As for your dad, it must have been horrible for him when this happened, but he's been an adult for a long time now. If he still feels he caused this, that's on him, because clearly he needs some therapy getting past this. The therapy would have helped him realize how impossible this is. He also should not be talking to his kids this way (or your stepmom shouldn't be). It will make them feel they have to be perfect or dad might end his life. That's incredibly unfair.

    Of course nobody can file suit. Honestly, it sounds like you're surrounded by nutcases. Your uncle's drowning at age 3 is far more likely to have started his downward spiral, but there was still something else wrong - with him, not your dad.
    10 answers · 18 hours ago
  • I am not allowed to lock the bedroom door, is this normal?

    Best answer: It's kind of confusing when you call yourself a "guest". What exactly does this mean? People are telling you she's weird, but this is missing the point and it doesn't help you. She may have valid reasons for not wanting doors locked in her home. More importantly, this isn't as... show more
    Best answer: It's kind of confusing when you call yourself a "guest". What exactly does this mean?

    People are telling you she's weird, but this is missing the point and it doesn't help you. She may have valid reasons for not wanting doors locked in her home. More importantly, this isn't as uncommon as you think. For example, a lot of parents I know remove locks from bedroom doors in new homes.

    The point of all this is if you're living in a place where the only way you feel safe is to lock your doors, you need to leave. The only exception would be if you're a tenant and your lease doesn't say anything about locking doors. But if that was the case, I don't think you'd be calling yourself a "guest".
    15 answers · 2 days ago
  • My partner went through my messages without my permission...?

    Best answer: You say you might "soon" be afraid of being in the home alone with him, but re-read your question. You're already afraid! This is a very risky and dangerous head game you're playing with yourself. Even your title proves this. The fact he went through your messages isn't the problem here. ... show more
    Best answer: You say you might "soon" be afraid of being in the home alone with him, but re-read your question. You're already afraid! This is a very risky and dangerous head game you're playing with yourself.

    Even your title proves this. The fact he went through your messages isn't the problem here. The problem is he's violent and abusive.

    Ignore the advice to go to court to get him evicted. In every state, the only person who can evict is the owner of the property. You can't ask the landlord to do it, either, unless you're willing to show him the damaged property. But there's no reason for you to go through this.

    Also, unless you're willing to press charges, don't call the cops. They're not social workers, and they get tired of being called to calm down a maniac. Besides, it's still not solving the problem.

    You say you have nowhere to go, but I doubt this is true. More likely, you don't want to have to tell someone WHY you need out. But you need to escape before this gets worse. If you run out of options, call a shelter.
    14 answers · 2 days ago
  • How do I stop being so mean to my mom?

    Today my mom and I went shopping, and she left the car key in the trunk by mistake. We got locked out, and I started yelling at her telling her how dumb she is for doing that. I felt terrible afterwards. How do I stop being so mean to my mom?
    Today my mom and I went shopping, and she left the car key in the trunk by mistake. We got locked out, and I started yelling at her telling her how dumb she is for doing that. I felt terrible afterwards. How do I stop being so mean to my mom?
    9 answers · 13 hours ago
  • My sister won't pay rent. My mom is kicking her out. Who is in the wrong?

    My 19 year old sister is doing good. I'm proud of her. She pays for her stuff she goes to college. But my mom is single with two younger kids and she works 2 jobs struggling to pay for everything. She started asking my sister is she could give her 50$ a paycheck. My sister is out of school for the summer and is... show more
    My 19 year old sister is doing good. I'm proud of her. She pays for her stuff she goes to college. But my mom is single with two younger kids and she works 2 jobs struggling to pay for everything. She started asking my sister is she could give her 50$ a paycheck. My sister is out of school for the summer and is working. My sister fights with my mom and tells her she doesn't think she should have to pay any money. They got into a big fight and my sister pushed my mom out of her room and told her to get out of the room and my mom just kicked her out. They both hate each other now and I'm wondering who is in the wrong ?? BTW my sister won't be homeless she has people who will let her move in and finish school and be fine.
    9 answers · 16 hours ago