I think I have depersonalization disorder??

I started noticing it when I was pre-teen, like 10 or 11, I knew everything was real and that it was happening but I didn't feel like I was experiencing it like I used to. I felt like it was a dream I had no control over, even though I knew I could control my actions I didn't feel like I could. This slowly... show more I started noticing it when I was pre-teen, like 10 or 11, I knew everything was real and that it was happening but I didn't feel like I was experiencing it like I used to. I felt like it was a dream I had no control over, even though I knew I could control my actions I didn't feel like I could. This slowly progressed to get worse, some days I would wake up and know that this thing just got spontaneously worse, and then I would give myself an anxiety attack over it. The worsening of my symptoms usually but not always coincided with me being sick or taking antibiotics. Last summer I had surgery to remove my gallbladder due to gallstones (rare since I was 13 at the time and not obese) and was prescribed vicodin afterwards. Ever since finishing the vicodin and laying around the house for month worrying about healing I've gotten immensely worse in some aspects of it, but more used to the others.
Update: For example I now feel like I am in a heavy and deep fog, but more used to the fact that I don't feel many emotions anymore and hardly ever get excited. I really want to be happy or sad again, I never feel anything. I really want to come out of the fog and enjoy my life, I feel like part of it's been taken... show more For example I now feel like I am in a heavy and deep fog, but more used to the fact that I don't feel many emotions anymore and hardly ever get excited. I really want to be happy or sad again, I never feel anything. I really want to come out of the fog and enjoy my life, I feel like part of it's been taken because I never can enjoy myself like this.
Update 2: Every now and then I feel these intense bursts of euphoria, usually when listening to music, but sometimes just randomly. Am I just suffering from depersonalization disorder or am I slowly loosing my insanity and become schizophrenic or paranoid?
Update 3: I went to my Grandpa's funeral recently and didn't feel anything. We were extremely close. I saw him lying in the open casket and it was like it didn't matter because that wasn't him and I wasn't me, sort of like when I look in the mirror. I never cried once during that experience because it was... show more I went to my Grandpa's funeral recently and didn't feel anything. We were extremely close. I saw him lying in the open casket and it was like it didn't matter because that wasn't him and I wasn't me, sort of like when I look in the mirror. I never cried once during that experience because it was so unreal, I can't envision myself crying over anything anymore. I can't see myself being happy either. I just want to feel something, anything. I used to be really anxious when I was a kid over nothing and have read that anxiety can sometimes cause depersonalization disorder.
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