Any of you think of ex boyfriend/girlfriend during sex?

I still find myself thinking about my ex boyfriend alot (usually daily) even though he turned out to be a total jerk, he was the best sexual partner I ever had and it he turned me on like no other, he is remarried & so am I and we havent been married long. My hisband is a wonderful man but isnt too hot in bed, and I have tried to show him what I like but he is not as verbal as my ex either & he is 46 so probably never will, be. I think of my ex sometimes when we are having sex. Sometimes I think crazy stuff like I would throw it all away just to have that passion (mindblowing) that I had with ex. Anyone ever been through this? Does it ever go away? I have not been turned on by anyone since him nearly as much (very little as a matter of fact. Me & x were spontanious, loved to do it when it hit us, my hubby is reserved & well kinda boring, help!

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  • 1 decade ago
    Best answer

    Seems you may have gotten married to the wrong man, If it ain't happening in the bed it ain't happening...period.Now you got yourself in quite the predicament. You either

    A. Tell hubby you need mindblowing sex from him

    B.Get mindblowing sex from ex ie. cheat :(

    C. Get over yourself cause you married this man and LOVE should be the reason for your love making not your animal urges.

    I am all for awesome sex, but a lifetime with a total jerk ain't worth repeated mindblowing orgasims(gasp) You need to realize these are 2 very different men, and you should realize the sex is also very different and always will be, you will never feel with you hubby what you felt with your ex, but that doesn't mean sex can't be great, you gotta find what works for the 2 of you once you do it'll a million times better than your ex ever was, because I bet your husband treats you well, unlike the jerky ex, Good luck

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Sounds like you have some emotional problems. You need to get over your ex. It might end up hurting your current relationship. You shouldn't try to compare sexual partners, cause everyone does things differently. And sometimes men need a lesson once in a while. Whenever you have sex, make sure you tell him exactly what feels the best, and praise him for doing the right stuff by telling him how good he is. That might help make him feel more confident and even more verbal in the bedroom. But comparing him to your ex is just going to hurt you in the end.

  • 1 decade ago

    Wow, that sucks. I can't say that you will ever stop these thoughts from entering your mind, that is something that you will have to continuously work on. You can try to focus on what your husband does do in/out of bed that you like. Then you can try and have him do more of it. I hate to say it, but, your husband being "boring" in bed isn't why you are thinking of your ex. The issue lies with you, but it's normal. You didn't mention how old you were, not that age would matter much, but the point is that we must mature and grow from all past experiences and instill that knowledge into our new relationships. NOT COMPARE. Try communicating with your husband and find out what he likes, then tell him what you like...start surprising him...start making new and exiting memories with him! You will forget all about those ex memories before long. Good Luck!

  • 1 decade ago

    yup. i'm in the same boat. i love my hubby but my ex was so hot in bed! a great kisser too! i actually think i miss that more. but you said that your ex turned out to be a jerk so fantasize a little bit in the sack but realize that you actually ended up with the better man. have you tried to tell your hubby that you want to spice things up a bit? maybe you should just start doing different things. do very little things at first (so you don't freak him out!) maybe a blindfold? or an extra sexy outfit?

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  • 1 decade ago

    It will not go away unless you let it. Focus on your man now or else you might end up saying the wrong name at the worst time. Or you can always use your ex on the side if he is avalable. as long as it keeps you happy.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I never think about anyone else other than the person that I am having sex with...but as far as your feelings going away...no they never will...some hurts just stay..they get less and less...It's sorta like breaking a leg; it heals. But you still limp.

  • 1 decade ago

    NO I DONT THINK OF MY EX DURING SEX! MY MAN IS BETTER IN EVERY WAY...EXCEPT SPONTANEOUS! AND I DONT MIND! I RARELY THINK OF MY EX AT ALL! THEY ARE EX FOR A GOOD REASON YOU KNOW! REMEMBER THAT ALSO! A GOOD RELATIONSHIP IS NOT ALL ABOUT SEX ...WHEN IT COMES DOWN TO IT , SEX IS A FRINGE BENEFIT OF A GOOD RELATIONSHIP NOT THE FOUNDATION OF ONE!

  • 1 decade ago

    No I never do whenever I think of an ex I want to puke

  • 1 decade ago

    I do it all the time, but my hubby doesn't have to know....

    so yeah, you're not alone.

  • 1 decade ago

    yes

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