Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 1 decade ago

Guys out there -- What can a girl do to take things slow but keep your interest at the same time?

A question for the guys. You meet a girl to whom you are instantly attracted (in every way) and she's also into you in the same way. But she wants to "take it slow", meaning she wants to first get to you know you really well, see if there's a friendship and potential for a relationship, before becoming physically involved with you. Any suggestions for how to do that and keep the spark going at the same time?

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Best answer

    yes, date a male who is emotionally prepared to not just want you for sex and secretly planning to dump you right after.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Try this... Be yourself. Don't act stupid, but don;t act like you know more than you really do. Admit if you don;t know something. Also, let the guy be himslef. Allow him is "self" time w/ his buds. Keep and cherish your own friends. Have your own "self" time. Hold hands. Laugh together. See movies together, go out in public together. Be friendly with his formeds, siblings, and especially parents. Be SURE that he does the same to yours. RESPECT each other. If he raises a hand to you just once - RUN (don't walk) away. Sorrys don't count. Don't drop yours (or his) pants before you know each other. If you can't talk about your past openly without judgement (or his), you can't expect a lasting relationship. When you get to that point, be open about your health - emotional and physical. Protect yourself. If he can't take the time to wrap it up, don't give him the time to place it in the box.

    Source(s): My feelings, and I'm a dude who is straight.
  • 1 decade ago

    It is difficult to do but it can be done. I would not spend too much time alone at either's place or the temptation may get the best of both of you. If you are really that into each other and see a future then tell him how you feel about being intimate too soon. If he is truly worth it, he will understand.

  • .
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    It's easier than you think to get to know each other and keep the spark -- go out in public. Sit, talk, hold hands, swap stories, gaze adoringly and laugh over dinner, lunch, a baseball game, or whatever but don't be alone together other than for a steamy goodnight kiss in the parking lot.

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  • 1 decade ago

    it depends how long you make him wait and also if you've even discussed this with him yet. If he knows he has to wait for a certain amount of time, he might do what you want until that time comes. to test him, just be yourself, make him laugh at something quirky you do. Or if a good song comes on, just dance a little bit, don't grind on him, but just dance a little bit to yourself; it will get his attention and cause him to look at you. If you get horny, just rub one out to hold you over. If he likes you and wants to invest time in you, then he will. If not, then he won't. It seems like you are one of the sweet girls that rarely come along so if he DOES screw you over, there will be other guys that would love to make that time for you so don't get discouraged and turn into a hoochie. a decent guy will come along...good luck

  • Debra
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    You sound just like me. You are in high school. Honestly, high school like and love generally doesnt last longer than max 3 months and that seems like forever. Of course, there are always the exceptions. Was the first guy your first love? If so, boy, you got over him fast. Good for you! You are already on to this next one. I believe you are doing everything right. However, you are doing it in excess. Just tone it down a little and you will be fine. Remember high school love is kinda fickle. Again, there are some exceptions.

  • 1 decade ago

    You are asking the wrong gender to answer this question.

    Given the choice of maintaining a close friendship with a girl for an indefinite period of time without sex, or pursuing a relationship with any number of other girls who enthusiastically offer both, guess which one most heterosexual males will choose?

  • 1 decade ago

    You can still date someone without being intimate. Go to dinner and movies and typical date things... but do not make the first move. Let her know that when she is ready she just needs to tell you. And really get to know her... ask lots of questions so that she knows you are truely interested in her. If you are attracted to her, that will not go away. So take it slow... and keep one foot on the ground at all times. LOL (I dated a pastor... our rule!)

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Yes. Be more than superficial yourself. A relationship is about two people, so you need to focus on more than what you want to get out of it, and you need to be able to contribute to it on an equal footing. So figure out why he should want to be around you, what you have to offer in the things you do and conversation you can hold to keep his specific interest.

    And above all else, never pretend to be something you are not.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    If the guy really cares about you and wants a long term relationship with you then he will take it slow no matter what. If he tries to rush you into the sack then he is only in it for one thing.

  • 1 decade ago

    Good question. Not sure of the answer. I would have to say just be fun, go out and do lot's of activities together.

    But.....What's wrong with "going all out" right from the beginning? If it's not meant to be it's not meant to be. At least you will have enjoyed yourselves for awhile. Doesn't make you a bad person (or bad people) because you go to bed with them early in the relationship.

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