Capricorn would become pissed really quickly when he realizes that this is not a dinner meeting to secure a new deal and his short 17-hour workday has been disrupted by nonsense. He would leave quickly to go call his wife to tell her that he'd be working late (not realizing that she left him two years ago but he didn't notice because he was working) but instead goes to find a hooker because he deserves the break after a (ruined) day of hard work.
Aquarius would be soliciting donations to help fund his latest non-profit organization dealing with autism. He would provide stats on the prevalence of autism in today's society and why not helping will mean that the future may be damned. But, then he would laugh at the absurdity because apparently "the future is now."
Pisces would be telling anyone who will listen that they haven't yet had a bi-sexual experience but that they are open to the idea (because they are so evolved). It turns out that no one is listening so Pisces is happy to just daydream about the erotic encounter (while trying to smoke a joint made of smoked turkey and seaweed).
Aries would be bouncing off the walls competing with Leo for every ounce of attention available (and not available) in the room and would simulateously be telling everyone how they rode a bike from New York to Los Angeles in one day.
Taurus would be aruging with virgo about the supposed "fine wine" and insisting that the finest Pinot Noir grapes come from the _____ region and that his position is supported because he once commissioned Zogby to do a poll of 6,000,000,000 people who all, ironically, answered in a way that affirms his stance (not that their opinions mattered anyway but the poll was done in the event that such an argument would ensue). Aries would take issue with Taurus' assertion because she commissioned a Zogby poll, too, and his/hers was done yesterday and the results concluded something entirely different (and, apparently, BETTER).
Gemini would be nonchalant about the whole gathering and would be itching to get out of there and go gambling or something. He would incur a moment of wrath from Aries for telling a funny joke (that no one but Aries heard) that seemingly stole Aries' thunder.
Cancer would be holding back tears because Aries pushed her out of the way and took the chair at the head of the table even though Cancer insisted that it was his/her seat (in his/her house). Cancer would simultaneously be trying to summon the courage to spit in Aries food before heading up to his/her room to get away from the crowd and watch a little television in private. Cancer will throw a party but s/he won't stay to enjoy it. The world is in peril, don't ya know?
Leo would be at the TRUE head of the table on the opposite end and laughing at Aries for daring to think that s/he could steal attention from her/him. Leo would be graciously serving everyone knowing that by serving he is simply letting the "commoners" in her/his "kingdom" know that he is capable of being (and, during holidays and special events, willing to be) "one of them." He would then (silently) provoke Aries to pour drinks (even though Aries thinks it was her/his own idea because everyone should know how "truly humble" s/he in fact is." When Aries starts talking loudly, Leo would simply whisper forcing everyone to end up paying greater attention to what s/he was saying. Foiled again, Aries!
Virgo would be looking at everyone's outfits and determining whether or not they were made of fine fabrics all the while trying to figure out how to accidentally spill "fine wine" on Taurus' crisp white shirt. Virgo wouldn't end up doing it, though, because the shirt is just pressed so damn well! "No criticism here," thinks Virgo, "THIS time (muaaaaaaah)!"
Libra would be looking in a mirror asking who was the prettiest in the land and feeling a little concerned that it might be the Cancer. That wouldn't phase the Libra so much, though, because s/he would know that her/his personality outshines that of the Cancer and would thus conclude that s/he is the best "package" in the land. For that reason, s/he would determine that s/he is still the best bet for anyone seeking a good relationship and not a mediocre one. S/he would then compliment Cancer to maintain internal balance for her/his vanity (but not really mean it).
Scorpio would be silent as a mouse, watchful of everyone in the room while googling people on his/her iPhone to see what dirt they can dig up (because each person in the room will betray the Scorpio someday and s/he will have the necessary ammo to ultimately destoy their lives). Also, Scorpio is trying to remember the "how-to's" of astral projection and making a mental note about whose dreams s/he will astral project into that night in order to read their thoughts up-close and haunt them if necessary. Top of the list for a good occultic haunting will be Aries (she took the choice cut of beef that Scorpio had been eyeing from the back of the line and Scorpio is sure this was an intentional act). All this while masturbating.
Saggitarius will be laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and giggling (they change it up sometimes) and laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing... Ironically, no one will have told a truly hilarious joke that warrants such a response all evening. Eventually Aries would laugh louder.
Wicked sense of humor!