Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Society & CultureReligion & Spirituality · 1 decade ago

Please help!...i was just rejected.. and I really need some advice?

Guys Please help!...i was just rejected.. and I really need some advice?

There has been this guy in my college classes that has been finding me at my study area and approaching me on a consistent basis for the last 6 months always to ask silly questions that dont have much substance.. yet we still arent really friends.

He is american, but hindu.. and has a conservative family and I'm white american.. and not at all conservative. One day we even talked for 2.5 hrs after school when he could have gone home. We were seeing each other even more frequently recently (bc he was finding m e).. it was like he was meeting w me for every excuse possible.. so i was sure he liked me. So thinkin he was nervous (prob a virgin.. maybe never had a gf) i decided ok.. im finally gonnna hit on him.. bc he just seems to be unsure of how to move it to the next level. So i wrote on my paper " What are you doing tonight" and grinned..He pauses, smiles, and says "nothing". Then throughout class he seemed to be nervous... but he wasnt sending any " i am trying to get as far away from you as possible vibes" For example. his legs were pointing towards me and close to me.. a general indicator of interest, not something ud think he'd do if he didnt like me and was like oh no... she likes me.. hed prolly try to get far away, and turn slightly away. So then right as class gets over I say "hey have you ever been to the honors lounge".. and hes like "no"...and i said "do you want me to show you where it is?", and i laughed then he says"eh i dont think so, i think im gonna go home" quickly changed the subject and went home.

TOTal punch to the stomach. What went wrong? What do you think of it all?

Did he never like me, was he a chicken, is a afraid of going against his parents wishes? Whats most likely do you feel?

13 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
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    Well my parents are hindu and yes there are very concervative so it might be that he is afraid of what his parents might think and if he is a virgin mabe he is scared of what you might think of him so he decided to just block you out completly. Just give it some time and if hes not feeling it dont sweat it theres plenty of fish in the sea. Remeber a relationship takes two people dont try and force one cause you might end up getting hurt

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  • First off, I'd say the body language thing is very over-rated. He might just have found that position more physically comfortable.

    Maybe he was nervous. Maybe he had an actual reason he needed to get home quick that day. Or maybe he's only interested in you as a friend and not sure how to deal with romantic interest. I'd say you should try having an open conversation about the subject; might be awkward but it's the only way you're gonna find out what's going on.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    He sounds like a very nice young man.

    What is the honors lounge...? You probably scared him...you are being to aggressive, let him guide the relationship.... he isn't thinking about the 'Next Level'. He doesn't see the relationship as you are....he most likely doesn't believe in sexual relations before marriage....he sees it as a commitment for life.

    Do you know how hard it is for a man to control his hormones when he is trying to do what is it the right thing by you and him....I suggest you find out what his faith/ beliefs may be before anything else....whether you decide to remain friends or develop a relationship as a couple.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Going to guess your in Highschool... (yes, it would be a little different if it was Jr, high, college, or work).

    He might have gotten scared

    His family might have been expecting him to come home right away

    He could be major traditionalist and wanted to make the first move

    He might have hear horror stories of the "honors lounge"

    Just see if he starts talking to you again. He probably will then you can find out the answer.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Don't presume you are rejected. He wants your attentions but is also afraid of them that they might get to where he cannot control himself. Probably would be better to find out his mother's name and ask about her.

    Her interests, hobbies etc. Get to know the family more and you will make better dating choices. You might find he has a great family that is close or you may find his family is all divided and you would be dating trouble. If is funny that people think the mate is the only one that affects the marriage when they are married they find out that is not true.

    So in summary do not be discouraged, rather be encouraged and try better stratigies for yourself and for him.

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  • 1 decade ago

    To be honest it sounds to me that you are young, just becoming independent and emerging into the real world from the cotton wool protection of your parents.

    Hence the 'total punch in the stomach' remark.

    Seriously, there is a whole pile of bleh out there, as you journey through life you will find that you will be rejected left right and centre by all means of people and reasons, friendships, men, jobs, life in general.

    It is unreasonable to believe that in life everything goes exactly to plan or your way. We try and try again, sometimes we win but more often fail. You just have to take the knocks and move on to try again.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    There are children starving; people living on the streets; the economy is falling.

    I say this to say... it could be much worse. Get over it and try to have a good day.

    .

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  • 1 decade ago

    He may be nervous. Or maybe he really needed to go home. Chances are he's nervous and afraid of what his parents will say.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    He probably doesn't drink.Some people aren't into the club scene,Hindu or not

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  • 1 decade ago

    This should probably go in the dating section.

    I think he likes you, but i'm no expert.

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