Urgent Advice Needed. Please help?

I'm sorry about the length of this question, in advance.Just by asking this question, I feel really nervous and anxious. I've never felt confident with my appearance... well... ever. I can remember hating myself as early as Grade 4 and it's gotten worse since then. I turned 15 a few days ago and despite... show more I'm sorry about the length of this question, in advance.Just by asking this question, I feel really nervous and anxious. I've never felt confident with my appearance... well... ever. I can remember hating myself as early as Grade 4 and it's gotten worse since then. I turned 15 a few days ago and despite having a really good few days, I've done nothing but cry for the past 2 hours.

I absoloutely hate myself. I don't want to look in the mirror anymore and everytime I do, I just burst into tears because of the monster that reflects back at me. I've made a physical list of all my imperfections but I'm not going to write them all down here. Though, they do include: my puffy eyes, fair skin, freckles on arms, ocassional acne, bad hair, braces, squinty eyes when I smile, my body not being proportioned nicely and a chubby face. I could go on forever.

Going out with friends has become a chore and I force myself to school everyday. I can't stand seeing the other attractive girls and comparing myself to them. Tonight alone, I have pulled out my ID card from my purse over 10 times just to scrutinize my every feature and I dread the day in a few weeks when it's published in the year book.

I would die to look like anyone else. It's hard feeling the way I do constantly and I wouldn't wish these feelings on ANYONE else. I feel like I'm in a dark and lonely place. I've reached out and tried to explain my feelings to only a couple of people but I don't think they truly understand the desperation and anger that I feel within myself. Counselling probably isn't even an option for me right now.

This is not an "Am I pretty?" question and I beg you not to rate me, but I am including link of my photo at the bottom of this question. I am so hesitant to post this link because I don't want any hateful comments. Though, I am expecting them.
http://s678.photobucket.com/albums/vv147/Kirsty_1994_photos/?action=view&current=SANY2791.jpg

Is there anything I can do to get out of this mess? How can I reverse years of self-hate and feel better about myself? Any advice will do. I can't cope with this anymore.

I wait anxiously for your answers... Thanks in advance..
Update: I forgot to add that I know this is the age where a lot of people become critical of the appearance but I think my problems are severe compared with the body image that my peers have.
Update 2: I can't believe I've posted a picture of myself.

I feel the tears coming back... Oh gosh.
Update 3: That photo isn't the best one of me.. the lighting isn't even good. I took it last night because i had no pictures on this computer. I regret posting it... I still feel slightly panicky.
Update 4: AH! Oh my gosh. Thankyou all for such brilliant answers. I don't know how on earth I'm going to choose a best one. The help I've recieved is incredible, amazing and brilliant. I will most definately take all of your advice to heart. Even the past few days, I've been feeling a lot better about... show more AH! Oh my gosh. Thankyou all for such brilliant answers. I don't know how on earth I'm going to choose a best one. The help I've recieved is incredible, amazing and brilliant. I will most definately take all of your advice to heart. Even the past few days, I've been feeling a lot better about myself, thanks to you all.

I'm going to try and choose a best answer tonight but I have no idea how I'm going to choose it. It's a good problem to have.

(((((((HUGS))))))))
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