Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 10 years ago

I need help from girls about this complicated relationship.?

Please read all. It's not some stupid childish how do I get a girl to like me post.

In mid 2006 I was in residential treatment for 5 months for severe depression and attempted suicide. I met a girl in there named ashley, and she liked me. I didn't think much of it because there were a lot of those stupid kiddie relationships in there. I'm not an emo kid, and I wasn't in there socializing and trying to make friends, but we became friends. After I got out, we didn't talk. about 1 1/2 or 2 years later, I was given her myspace by another person I kept in contact with from there. We started talking again and she started to have feelings for me again, so we started hanging out a few times. Well after hanging out with her those feelings disappeared and she basically wanted to be friends. She did something that pissed me off and I stopped talking to her. Then about a year and a half after that, I was doing community service(for probation) at this thrift store. Well she was in there to doing community service(for a scholarship deal). We recognized each other but didn't talk. I noticed every time I would look around I would see her and she'd turn away like she wasn't watching me. Well the next day I got an email from her and she wanted to hang out. The first night I took her out, those feeling were back again for her. But something happened and we stopped talking again for like 6 months or so. Well she texted me about 3 weeks ago just saying goodnight out of the blue. We started talking for about a week and I started hanging out with her. She was talking about dating and everything often. I mostly went over to her house and hung out with her. We've been hanging out like every other day, sometimes more. Her mom loves me to death. She doesn't really have any family but her mom has friends she's known since before ashley was born, so they're basically family. They really like me too, and everyone does basically. Ashley has been saying she wants to take it slow. It started with the kisses goodnight when I would leave. About a week later, I asked how she felt about me. You know, any more or any less. Now she says she likes me a little. I asked her where we're at, and she said friends, but she doesn't know what the future holds. After that, she just stops kissing me goodnight. I'm 19, and she's 17, so she sometimes smokes these cloves called Blacks, and I buy them for her, but only sometimes, because I smoke cigarettes and don't want her to get addicted. I drive her around too, but only when we hang out. I don't like drive her to her friends houses and stuff, but when we go out, I drive. She offers to give me gas money, and pay for her own movie tickets, but I take care of it. Now last night we were supposed to hang out and when I was about to go to her house she says, "No, Don't". She said she was at the mall with her mom, which I believe. They are really close and always go to dinner and the movies and stuff. So I ask her when I can come get her. Her response is, "did you get me the pack or not?". The pack of clove cigs is what she means. I said maybe, why?. She said, "can you get me a blunt wrap and drop them off to me?". Now I feel like I'm being used or taken advantage of. She said the wrap is for a friend. I used to do drugs kind of heavy, so I don't want her to, and she only smokes pot once in a blue moon. So if it's for a friend, then I'm supposed to drop her stuff off and leave back home so she can go chill with a friend?(if thats even true) I don't think so. I'm nice, but not a pushover. I really like this girl, but I think by being to nice, maybe even trying a little too hard, I've F**ked this up. She likes me one day, then suddenly she doesn't the next. But she always wants to hang out with me and enjoys being with me. It's a real mind f*ck. Help? and advice?

8 Answers

Relevance
  • Anonymous
    10 years ago
    Best answer

    hey, alright. this is really complicated dude. i got it. i'm sorry. i would say she is using youu. she didnt even invite you to hang with them if you brought the pack, i would take a break from this girl. but stay friends, for sure. she seems like she does like you but maybe not more than friends. i know girls who take advantage of guys and it isn't right. be careful ill say. i think her giving kisses then you asking what she felt, rushed her a little, and she got anxious...try your very best for no awkwardness, too. i hope i helped. good luck, bud & remember that people change- she could not be the same girl she was four years ago.

  • 10 years ago

    I think in a way your being used. But at the same time she seems to not know exactly how she feels either. If i were in her position, I would want you to just be totally honest with me about how you feel. Just spill it all out. The key to a good and healthy relationship is honesty. And if you're honest then you can expect her to be too. If she's not, then I think you should just move on because if she turns out to have been using you this whole time it'll only hurt you worse in the end and if your not honest with her soon then it'll only hurt her worse in the end. So you need to just sit down and talk to her, keeping in mind that this isn't the only girl in the world and you'll find plenty of others with similar personality traits and someone who can love you for who you are and not someone who uses you to smoke.

  • 10 years ago

    Is she still suffering from depression or anything like it? If so that can be the reason of her acts. She sound confused. In a way she likes you but something is holding her back. Try to talk to her about it. Maybe she will tell you the truth but if she didn't and continued to act this way, then maybe it really is the time to move on. It all depends on you. So think about it carefully and then make your decision. Good luck.

  • 4 years ago

    LISTEN TO YOUR MOM!!! She is soooo right, you are too young for a relationship with this girl. I did not have my first boyfriend until 10th grade. I personally think that if this girl truly likes you she will wait until 9 grade to go out with you. Or who knows maybe its just a crush and you will get over her before then. You and her friendship is more important than dating at the moment.

  • What do you think of the answers? You can sign in to give your opinion on the answer.
  • Anonymous
    10 years ago

    it sounds like she taking advantage of you. just try and forget about her and move on. she obviously likes you but not more than friends. and shes taking advantage of you by telling you to buy the pack ..when shes know yu will sense u like her...i would just move on ...sorry

  • 10 years ago

    If you all were meant to date you would have dated by now. She enjoys being friends with you and wants you to do stuff for her but she doesn't want to date you.

  • 10 years ago

    Break up with her because shes no good. And stop smoking its bad for you!

  • 10 years ago

    dump that woman!!!

Still have questions? Get answers by asking now.