Lacus
Lv 4
Lacus asked in Family & RelationshipsFriends · 10 years ago

My friend is acting really weird. 10 pts to anyone who gives some sensible advice!?

Hello everyone,

My best friend has been acting weird now. It is now the exam period and everyone is stressed out and she is too but we were still okay. At 8pm one night, she sent me this sms saying that I am her best friend and all that(one of those forward messages), then at 12 mn, she suddenly smsed me again and says that she needs to be alone and that it has nothing to do with me. She also says that she has no idea how long she will take. Then, next day in school, she won't answer my calls or reply to smses and when I finally found her, she refuse to do anything more than nod or shake her head and speak a word or two really softly. She avoids me and stuff like that.

It makes me both angry and worried and I feel bad for feeling angry at her. Can't she tell that her mood will be affecting mine and that her current behavior might affect my exam grades? I know that friendships are more important than grades and stuff like that but I'll admit that I am selfish like that and can't help but feel that she is selfish too. Why must she do this when everyone is most stressed? What should I do??? Leave her alone? Pester her? What????

We also planned a party right after exams and I am not sure whether to cancel the party or what. She still says that she is up for it but she doesn't look like she is up for it. I don't know what to do now???? I still have to study for exams and everything!!!!! I know it s really selfish of me to want to party but I feel so torn. I want my party and I want her friendship and her to be happy. Just what the heck is going on?????

Someone help!!!!

Update:

Thanks everyone who answered so far. 10 answers in less than half an hour is amazing. I almost cried reading your answers, thank you all. Reagarding one of the answers, she doesn't hang out with her other friends, she just disappears and according to her classmates, she doesn't talk at all, kind of a loner. I just did something stupid, I smsed her some random gibberish: "going crazy, I don't know anymore". I know... it's stupid but I feel like I am going to die or something....

Update 2:

To sherry:

I am the one who is getting near perfect GPA, she is failing. I spend dunno how many hours herping her pull her grades up and still manage to juggle everything else. Please don't say stuff like her parents told her to stay away from me as I know for a fact that she comes from a probamatic family and never talks to her parents. But thanks anyway.

14 Answers

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  • 10 years ago
    Favourite answer

    It sounds as though your friend may be going through a tough time. She may be feeling stressed or confused or she may have a problem that she doesn't want you to know about. When friends act weird it drives you crazy and it can be really hard to let it go. You want to know what's wrong, you want to know why she dose not trust you enough or feel close enough to you, to tell you what is wrong. I think the best thing to do would be to respect her wishes and leave her alone. You don't just have to abandon her, you could go up to her, or send her a note/text/e-mail or whatever and say that she is your best friend, you care about her a lot and although you're going to leave her alone now, you will always be there for her if and when she needs you. Then, leave it alone and focus on your exams, as they are very important and you will regret it if you don't work hard on them. Have the party and if she wants to join in, she will, if not, she won't. Its her choice. This may be a short fase and go on for a few days or weeks, or it may be a long term thing. Either way, she knows you care for her now, and she can come to you any time. The best thing you can do now, is focus on your exams and your life, and associate with your other friends. I really hope everything works out for you!! xxx

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  • 10 years ago

    I think the best thing you can do is to put the ball in her court. Tell her that you are there for her no matter what, you are worried about her and you hope she feels like she can talk to you about anything. But you are not going to pester her. Say you know where I am if you want me and if you do need to talk about stuff I am only a phone call away.

    From then on the ball is in her court. Still send her texts at school and say 'After my lesson I will be here, come meet me if you can'. If she ignores you then just hang out with other friends. Leave the ball in her court.

    As for the party, I think it might be the perfect way to cheer her up! She can forget about whatever is upsetting her so definitely still have it and try take her mind off it.

    If however you do start to worry about her seriously, think something is making her depressed etc then you should attempt to talk to her and get it out of her.

    People handle exams completely differently or it might be something else. Don't take it personally, she needs you now. Good luck

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  • Shelly
    Lv 4
    10 years ago

    You should just say to her that as you are her friend if she wants to talk to you about anything, you will listen. Other than that, what can you do? You have to worry about yourself too. Get yourself through the exams and then try again.

    I can't really guess what her problem might be, she may just even be acting dramatic for some attention or something. Be friendly but not pushy. Continue with the party as planned.

    Good luck!!

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  • ?
    Lv 4
    10 years ago

    hi,what a mess you guys have got into, firstly friendships in my opinion are not more important than exams actually, and why i say that is as a mum of 4 grown ups ,one still at college doing 2nd yr ,at 19, its paramount you achieve well good grades now or regret it for yrs and in doing so ruin any chances to gain meanifull employment,independance, a friend will come and go in life exams dont. now i would say from your letter you think differently,therefore your froiends parents have told her in no un certain terms to stay away from you,as your the one who says mates come before grades and if i were the parent id say exactly the same. so if you want to spend your life in a dead end job or on the dole then thats cool, for you as you have no drive, no aspirations to do well, but dont take her down with you she has all those things and everytime she tries to do what her parents tell her you show up and say,"what the hell! "lets hang out instead". now thats having a profound effect on her her family and her life and its just not fair or right,if you are a friend then agree to what she has to do ,and help her achieve good grades as she will help you.thats what a true mate does ok. so rather than stress at her and say derogetery syuff about her,get on with study.without it lifes a real slog,mine are finding out what a big difference study makes in getting a great job opposed to a job. dont join the queue get doing it now or later in life when you should be having party and going out with friends,you will be adult learning college.

    Source(s): personal exp
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  • Anonymous
    10 years ago

    She's probably just worried about school and your wanting to party is a distraction to her that is adding to her stress rather than releiving it. Give her time, let her succeed in her studies and focus on school yourself. If you find that you need to reduce some of your own stress, then do it in your own way that is safe and doesn't require the presence of your friend. Soon you will see that you were both being silly and things will be back to normal. You might even find that that you are more independant than you thought you were and your friend might realize that she needs you more than she thinks.

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  • 10 years ago

    It sounds like maybe she has some kind of trouble at home or school. You should ask her if there's anything you can help her with. Tell her you are there for her if she needs it, that's what friends do for each other. If there is something going on with her just make sure you do keep it between you and her.(could be something personal).

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  • 10 years ago

    it happened between 8 to 12.....what happened..??? dunno.....

    maybe someone called n told her something against u.....seems pretty serious too,....or else why would she start acting all weird like that......

    I feel really bad that this is all happening to you at the time when u had to sit n prepare for the exams....as if u had less to worry about

    All the very best,.....I hope things get better soon (:

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  • 10 years ago

    She sounds depressed. Probably just boy issues or an argument with her relatives but she could also be on drugs...but it's also possible that she's just stressed out because of the exams.

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  • Gamble
    Lv 5
    10 years ago

    Sounds Like shes having either guy troubles or possibly parent trouble. Or it could also just be stress from the exams.

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  • 10 years ago

    Sounds like a rumor was started. Someone said you said etc., It seems like she's avoiding you, and keeping conversations at a minimum to prevent people from seeing you together.

    I'm old, but if my friend was treating me that way, I'd have the party without her. If she shows up great, and I'd try to talk to her then. If not, I'd have fun anyway.

    Dawn

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