Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 9 years ago

How do I be less socially awkward around girls?

So i'm a 13 year old boy. I tend to... actually always do... have trouble talking to girls. Whenever I talk to girls I over think every single thing. I even think too much before I start a conversation! Whenever I see a bunch of girls in class or at my youth group, I desperately want to speak to them in any way. ( I know that sounds pathetic). But even before entering the building.. I am already thinking about what I should say, and how to try to be confident and not feel insecure or self-concious; so basically, I am nervous before I even step into the vicinity of a girl. It is easier if I am talking to one that is not very pretty, though. ... but even then it is still hard. It even happens to me on Facebook! SOMETIMES a girl will start talking to me and I will not reply for like 4-5 minutes thinking of a good thing to say,, but often times I just tell the girls I have to go and appear offline. I am that insecure. This one time a girl asked me if I wanted to video chat, and I replied, "I want to but I have to go. Sorry". I am wayy too insecure. I have obviously never had a girl friend or even a meer friend of the female gender. I am desperate, and this disability to talk to girls naturally and always thinking, 'What to say next' causes me to be shy and quiet... and I am not that person. I really hate this and I don't like thinking that "I have my whole life to work it out" and "I'm young", because most of my friends my age have girlfriends. Also, I will be in high school next year, and I am worried that this will basically destroy my social life. Part of this may be because I have an overbearing mother who only babies me all the time and she often times makes me feel guilt about myself. We get into arguments at least 5 times a week. She says a lot, "You are going to be a lonely, miserable person." to me. I hate how it is with her. Also, I have a older sister who is a sophomore in High School. She has a boyfriend and somehow does not let my mom bother her. I am so jealous of that. My sister always has a perfect argument and I wish I could have that. I am a terrible arguer, and bad at expressing how I feel always. I am very upset with my life, and would appreciate any advice.

5 Answers

  • 9 years ago
    Favourite answer

    Well understand that your human and they are too they probably feel the same fear is mainly caused by ignorance and the unknown you only live once and what's the worst that could happen they call the cops and you get arrested be you tell the truth and don't make the things you say premeditated because when you go by cut it could go better than planned stop being insecure by finding the cause and fixing it

    Source(s): High schools the best place to meet someone
  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    Hi, my name is Julia and I also have this problem. I also have a hard time talking to people (all people, mostly around boys). However, I can still keep a good conversation....the thing is that when I talk to boys, I blush so much and constantly look down. One boy pointed it out to me once and I blushed even more. So just keep in mind that your not the only one who has this problem!

    Just don't think about it and go with the flow....don't be too stressed out about it.... and it's kind of cute when a guy is shy. My friends (and many other girls) try to act cute in front of any boy no matter what they look like or what their personality is like. Me, on the other hand, whenever I see a boy, I tend to avoid them. The weird thing is, they always end up coming to me and smiling and I just get so embarrassed when if I blush in front of them (which happens every time). So just stay strong...

    And your mother actually says that to you? Oh my gosh that is so sad I'm so sorry....and I think that is the reason why you are so insecure all the time. Don't listen to anything she says and you'll be alright I promise :)

    And how to make your mom not bother you....well that's a tough one, I sometimes have that problem. But my mom is actually really sweet and nice so I don't really mind... so I don't have any suggestions on that one, sorry.

    How to be a good arguer.... I'm actually a very persuasive arguer. What I do, is I try my hardest not to lose my temper...because keep this in mind: *The first one who loses their temper in an argument loses* That is a very useful tip!

    Don't be upset with your life, your still young and even if it's not the best, you will always have time to fix it! So that's not a big problem. Good luck! :)

    Also, this is an answer I gave a while back about what girls like:;_ylt=Auvnp...

    I hope this helps! :)

    -Julia <3 <3 <3

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    Jesus Christ, This is exactly how I feel/am. Except, it's not only with girls, it's with every single person I'm not familiar with. I always get worried that I'm gonna look like a retard when I say something, so I barely say anything at all. I have no solutions to this sadly but, I hope you have better luck with girls and people overall then I do...

  • 9 years ago

    Same here, but I'm a 13 year old girl

    It's good to have something in mind when beginning to talk to a person but then the convo starts flowing! And it will probz b like that for u , up if ur talking to an interesting person lol

    Answer mine?;_ylt=AuAv8...

  • What do you think of the answers? You can sign in to give your opinion on the answer.
  • 9 years ago

    Its okay we girls don't bite. We are no different from guys...mostly :P just be yourself and polite. Instead of thinking all the time just SAY SOMETHING. (this is what annoys most girls) say "hi" "hows it going?" "you look nice today" anything positive and nice. Itll be hard at first but youll get used to it. Good luck!

Still have questions? Get answers by asking now.