Anonymous asked in PetsDogs · 8 years ago

I miss my dog so much and I can't wrap my head around why he died!?

My beautiful 13 yr. old lab died so suddenly out of the blue... I was just thinking the other day how well he had been doing and how it would be impossible to live without him. Then a day later he dies after a walk. I have had him for more than 1/2 of my life... he was my whole childhood... I just feel like no one understands... its just so hard because i don't think he knew he was going to die either and i am so worried that he was scared and needing me to help him in the 10 minutes that he was dying in the yard... i tried, but there was nothing i could do to revive him... i had to watch him suffering with his eyes open and tongue hanging out and like not breathing.... he was basically my whole world... the only other family i have is my mom and grandma... the rest of my family are dead... i just miss my beautiful dog... i felt like he was the only one who understood me and now i feel so alone... i keep having anxiety when i think of living without him....he was not just a dog to me... we did absolutely everything together... every trip basically i took, he was in the car with me....

i've read all the websites and the rainbow bridge poem but none of it helps... it was just so second he was taking a walk and the next he was dying in my yard... the worst part of it is i don't even know why he died... he was so healthy in spirit... yea he was older, but he was active and playful and always eating...i just keep thinking what i could have done differently and if i killed him somehow by feeding him something wrong or not noticing some sign...


the worst is i feel like i never got to say goodbye and never got to tell him how much i loved him... it just all feels so unfinished, so quick and horrific... i wish i could have told him it was going to be okay and that he was so so loved... i told him i loved him as he was dying but i was panicking and screaming for someone to help me and i am worried that he heard me panicked and that it made him scared when he was dying...

Update 2:

This is my second dog loss... i was really young when i lost my first beautiful dog (4th grade) and i remember feeling really sad... he was a rescue and we got him when he was 7... i loved him dearly... i remember we got a new dog and that helped the pain go away.... i still always talk to that dog up until this day...

my dog that just died has been with me since the 4th grade to 23 yrs old... he was with me during middle school, high school, college and college graduation.... it just is so hard because even though we didn't talk to each other with words, we were always communicating with our eyes and kisses and hugs.... he always looked to me to take care of him and fix his boo-boos but i feel like i let him down... he was really one of the loves of my life... i feel like i have lost my entire heart.. and i know people say getting another dog will help, but my dog never liked to share my affection... he was shy with other dogs and got sad when i was paying attention to others...

9 Answers

  • 8 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    I think we know what causes someone to die.

    Our cells wear out snd we wear out. Our question, " why?" is the most normal response to the loss of someone we love, Sam. It says so much about the depth of our attachment to our loved one. But, unlike humans, dogs have a special way of knowing how we feel, and they always care. Even if you werent there the whole time, he never questioned your loyalty and deep love. He had learned years ago about how much you love him. Whoever designed the dog had boys (?) like you in mind. As time goes on, you will remember things and realize that a wonderful person made him and that person knows how you feel. Grieve in your own way, but it will be ok. It will. My heartfelt sympathy is yours.

    Source(s): My heart, and knowledge about dogs and humans.
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  • Jazzie
    Lv 6
    8 years ago

    This was your first dog loss, I take it. And you are young. You are not alone, my dear. Every dog owning human who's spent their life in the company of dogs has lost 'a first dog' like you just did.

    That first dog loss is by far the hardest, because it's a first. I've lost 5 dogs during my life thus far and each and every single one of them was completely tragic and it hurt my heart a lot. ... No, you are NOT alone.

    Simple honest truths can be comforting to you if you let them:

    Your dog lived a blessed, long life with a family who loved him completely. That is a blessing.

    Your dog did not suffer when he left. YOU did, but it was quick for him. That is a blessing.

    Your dog died surrounded by love and those who loved him. That is a blessing.

    Your life has been changed for the better for having had this dog in your life. That is a blessing.

    When any being enters the dieing process, other systems begin shutting down. Your dog heard you, for sure, but did it affect him while he was dieing? Probably not. Dieing takes all your attention till attention is gone. You gave him your love as he was leaving ~ that's huge. Good job and I applaud you for being there with him as he left ~ that is very hard to do for some people. You deserve a hug for your efforts. You have nothing to lament yourself over ~ your dogs spirit will hold no grudges, you shouldn't either.

    You DID get to say goodbye to your dog ~ you were with him. You did just right. Smile and know that your dog loves you, too. And above all, forgive yourself and any other negativity you are harboring surrounding your dogs death as it won't fix a thing, but it will hurt your healing. Give yourself a break.

    This is a time of great sorrow for you. There are no shortcuts through this journey full of tears and and pain. Allow yourself to grieve fully as that is what ultimately opens your spirit to healing.

    My 1st dog came into my life when I was 4 and left when I was 22. That dog was 18 years old when he passed ~ I was an adult, but had known and loved that dog for nearly ALL of my life up to that point. I absolutely know what you're going through and you have my sympathies.

    You will survive this. You will grow. That next dog coming into your life will be so well loved and fortunate for the journeys you've had. You're a better person for having lived this. I won't promise that it gets easier as each dog is different and each brings a whole new story unique to the two of you. Some will be easier ~ some will be much harder ~ but you will get through for having been there before.... like me and many others.

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  • 8 years ago

    Your dog was 13 and a Lab, so pretty normal. He might have died from heart failure. Unless you had a necropsy done on him, there is no way of knowing. Well just say it was his time. Everything dies.

    Every little thing on this planet does not live forever.

    His spirit lives on. I know that's of no comfort when he want to hug his big furry body. But pretty much everyone on this Dog section knows the pain you are going through.

    And stop with any guilt. You did nothing wrong, and sorry to tell you but you cannot stop the process of death when their time is up.

    Perhaps consider a new pup? Not to replace, but your dog would want you to share the love he received with another.

    So sorry for your loss. Been there 13 times already. ;(

    Source(s): Dogs 30+ yrs.
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  • 8 years ago

    This is so sad. He DEFINITELY died a dog that was very much loved and it is not your fault in any way.

    Grief, eventually, becomes a natural healing process that helps us to handle the loss. To lose a heart dog suddenly like that is similar to losing a sibling in how powerful the emotions are going to be. Try to take heart from the fact that you can honour him later by teaching your next dog all you learned from him. Write it all down so that it can be remembered and also come to terms with as a displacement activity. He will soon be remembered not for that awful final ten minutes but for all the years of happy times you got to share and enjoy with him.

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  • 8 years ago

    I AM SO SORRY.I know how it is. I love the heck out of my little dog and i feel like only he understands sometimes. And losing a loved one especially so suddenly is awful. Even worse that you didn't get to say good bye. I thought i was a horrible person after my grandma died. She had fallen asleep and i didn't get to say good bye and that i loved her like i always did ( she was dying of lung cancer and died in her sleep). But you know what? you don't have to tell him in that final moment how much you love him. because he knows. that dog knows you love and no matter what will always love you. What i can suggest may sound heartless ,but really does help so much, is getting another pup. You might feel like your replacing your dog but your not. He wouldn't want you to be sad for him he'd want you feel better. My best wishes to you and your family.

    Source(s): Experience :'( and opinion
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  • 8 years ago

    You can try doing something all the time,then u will forget about the dog, you will be sad some time, but it will go over.

    I wish you good luck,and sorry about the dog :-)

    Source(s): Ps. My dog died too
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  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    I have to wonder why, instead of standing there, watching your dog die, that you didn't rush him to your vet's office?

    If you are wondering about the cause of death, have a necropsy done.

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  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    Ryu came in and did a Tatsumaki Senpuu Kyaku on your dog when you weren't looking.

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  • Jo Han
    Lv 7
    8 years ago

    I'm so sorry for your loss.

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