Lynnie asked in Arts & HumanitiesPoetry · 1 year ago

Help with a love poem?

I’m trying to write a poem for this guy I like who just so happens to be my roommate and my friends with benefits. I would love for him to be my boyfriend but I want to ask him out with something better than just out right asking “ Be my boyfriend?” I’m having trouble finding the words I want for one more line at the bottom after “so will you be my boyfriend..”. Any suggestions? Also if you think I could fix any wording to make it sound better or anything that sticks out that maybe you think could be edited I love constructive criticism especially because I never write poetry.

I think about you

do you think about me,

more than just sexually?

I think about you,

And everything you do

and I start to fall uncontrollably

I know we have our differences

And a slight age gap too

But that doesn’t matter to me

Because all I see is you

No matter how you look

No matter your mood

I love you

Do you love me too?

If the answer is yes

And I hope that it is

I want to be yours

And for you to be mine

So will you be my boyfriend?

5 Answers

  • 1 year ago

    ….. So, will you be my boyfriend?

    and take me gently in your arms as you whisper "Hi Friend!"

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  • 1 year ago


    Source(s): Unable to track so bright.
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  • 1 year ago


    Feelings. Firsts. Comparison. Tone.Pattern.Spread the Love.

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  • Pj
    Lv 4
    1 year ago

    If the answer is yes

    And i hope that it is

    --Then forever can we share a/this love so true?


    --Then forever let love my love burn for you..

    or something like that ending with a snap.

    I love your poem i think its beautiful and sexy,

    The ending cannot end with a direct question its a bit of an over throw to what you want.

    If he likes you he will get the point of what you want no need to impose.


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  • 1 year ago

    I have never used words to get a girlfriend or start a relationship.

    I just make sure she is ALWAYS happy to be around me and feel safe, comfortable and valued.

    If you are already having sex with someone and they have seen you naked... what more do you have to offer that would keep them?

    It won't be words. Guys really don't understand/get


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