It is just a total lack of training. You may have tried to train the dog but didn't know what you were doing. Your house hold is pretty normal. People who own dogs don't know any where near enough to take the best care, give the best training, forming a bond, understand the body language of a dog. Most people are just plain ignorant (lack of education/knowledge) about their dogs.
In my opinion, there is no dog that cannot be trained. Basic Obedience is just 7 simple commands with specific corrections. Everything you need to know about Basic Obedience training IS online. You can buy some dog training books, there are thousands or you can join an obedience class & learn with others like you. No owner & no dogs knows what is in store & do not know anything about training. I loved teaching in groups like this. They were fun. What the owners do & what the dogs do can sometimes be very funny. People make mistakes, dogs make mistakes, you learn & the dog learns to be obedient. & will respond to commands.