It sounds like you are going through a lot right now. Thank you for reaching out for help! Suicide is never the answer, as it is permanent and can never be taken back. You have a full life ahead of you, and ending your life is not the answer. If you feel like you cannot keep yourself safe right now, please seek professional help immediately.
Make sure that you tell someone about these thoughts like a close friend, or your school counselor. It is important to have people who support you through this. Sometimes when people go through difficult or stressful situations, suicidal thoughts can arise. The important thing is to seek help from those around you, and to be honest with what you are thinking.
Please know that there are people who can and will help you with what you are going through. You may want to consider talking with a counselor at a hotline. Many hotlines are 24/7 and will work with you and situations like yours. Some even have email and/or chat if you would prefer. I hope that you will continue to reach out!
Boys Town National Hotline, 1-800-448-3000