I'm sorry you are going through this, but it sounds like you and he are on different pages. Even if you could force him to come to your way of seeing things, I wonder if that is really the best thing long term. It sounds like this is a lopsided relationship, and instead of trying to recoup your investment in it, you would be better served by putting that time and energy into finding a new relationship where you will get back what you put in.
I know movies and TV promote the idea of fighting for love, and never giving up, but sometimes in life giving up on something that won't work is the right answer. They just don't make movies about that because who would want to watch? I know it hurts, but your future is out there, not in the past with some guy who doesn't want to work on your relationship. Take the lessons learned, and use them going forward. Find a new relationship and build that into something great. Trying to duct tape this deflated basketball of a relationship isn't going to give you what you ultimately want. Your heart is just hurting so you think it will. You've gotten everything out of this relationship that you will ever get. Spend your time/energy/heart on your new life in front of you. That is where you'll find the most reward.