Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Social SciencePsychology · 5 months ago

Our age difference seems to cause me stress?

I have fallen in love with a woman who is in her early 30s and I am still in my mid 20s. At first I didn't know her age and when I found out I didn't think it was such a big deal. We both like each other but lately, I have started to feel more and more stressed because of this. It seems that she might want to have childen sooner than me, but we haven't actually talked about it yet.

For me it's just that I haven't taken this into consideration and I haven't really been in a relationship for the last years. I would like to take things slowly and I don't want kids in the next years. I feel like I still have so many things to do. She does seem to have everything more planned and organized but she has never been in a serious relationship before in her whole life. This also causes me more stress and it is not how I had imagined things to turn out. I don't know what to do, should I be selfish and go my own way or try and make it work with her?

Update:

@Matej Yes well I am afraid I don't want children yet

4 Answers

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  • 5 months ago
    Best answer

    Sadly it doesn't say anything about marriage.

    I would say ask her.

    Let it be known.

  • 5 months ago

    Well, the ring-the-bell decent thing to do, meaning the best, most honorable thing, would be to talk to her about all this. Lay the cards out on the table and deal with these doubts and worries head-on. Let the chips fall where they may. You both may agree that some aspects of your relationship are whack, but you'll endure them to keep each other, or perhaps not - it's hairy thing to do but it clear the air for real. Nothing else does.

  • 5 months ago

    When a woman is around 25-30 years old, the quality of the eggs begins to deteriorate. This does not mean that you cannot have children, but it becomes more difficult to get pregnant. So I can understand why she would like to have children now, but I also understand that it is too early for you.

    There is an alternative, and it is that you can freeze the eggs. Then they will have the same quality even if she wants to use them several years later.

    • Mars Mission
      Lv 7
      5 months agoReport

      Funny you think having children is the ultimate thing
      You can do, and if the couple don’t want them?

  • 5 months ago

    I think it's very normal for her to want children since she's over 30 already. Having children does not mean you're never having fun again in any strech of imagination, I would say it's a hude blessing, besides, being in mid 20s is more than old enough to have children. That is my opinion.

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