Help with suicidal girlfriend who has lost everything?

We've been together for just over a year, she is religious and I am not, I converted to Islam for love but after extensive research and learning what it involves I've realised i cant do this for the rest of my life..

I miss my old life and it is making me go crazy.

I'll never forgive myself for converting so quickly and not thinking. Because of her culture and things she has been very uncomfortable with me planning to go see my main group of friends because a girl i went on a few dates with years ago is part of the group. I felt uncomfortable with this lack of freedom. We've tried to break up before but ive been persuaded to restart it and the time it seems right but later on i feel the same problem again. We need to break up but i am really struggling with it. We are married, we've got very intimate and because of her culture she feels no other man will want her. Also she has been persuaded by my views on religion and is now doubting her religion. On top of this, her family kicked her out when they found out about this and she has lost touch with friends, she has NO ONE other than me. ive told her we should break up and she's cutting her wrists in front of me she is in bed right now, i can't leave her alone, i still care for her so much, but i can't stay in a relationship i feel uncomfortable in right? My brain sometimes persuades me to just be with. She doesn't want me to contact my anyone what do i do? Suicide helpline? stay here? get my parents over? please help

4 Answers

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  • 6 months ago

    You have committed yourself to this relationship by marrying the girl - and to converting to her religion. That was down to your own passion and desire, which you appear to have lost - we cannot live in such a state for ever. So now you want to abandon her (and do the same to someone else?). The poor girl probably lived a very sheltered life, cocooned by her parents who, no doubt, wanted her to marry someone of her own race/religion. The result would probably have been similar. Her parents should bear some responsibility, but very probably won't. So now she just has you, who made the promises, spoken and unspoken. Basically you took advantage of her naïveté for your own desires, and having grown up a little bit perhaps, you want to abandon her. Difficult for you both - especially for her, of course, as you can simply walk away. Perhaps you should have some discussions with your own family. Find the friends you failed to encourage her to maintain. Assuming you are living together, you don't include your practical plans: one of you leaves and the other pays the rent on their own? You have some very fast growing up to do.

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  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    6 months ago

    You say she's just a girlfriend then then suddenly you're married. So not sure whether you'll have to divorce her or can just end the relationship and leave. The thing you will have to do before you go is make sure she's got supervision. You can appeal to her parents, telling them she's trying to kill herself and that they need to intervene. Hopefully their love for their daughter will outweigh their religious beliefs. If the family won't help then you'll have to take her to an acute psych intake center so you won't have her suicide on your conscience as you disconnect from this relationship.

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  • PAMELA
    Lv 7
    6 months ago

    Oh for god's sake, is she your girlfriend? wife? make your mind up, you need to get out of this relationship, it is going nowhere, so get divorced or just leave, otherwise you will have a miserable life, and we only have one life, so make the most of it.

    • Coach Simon
      Lv 7
      6 months agoReport

      One has to wonder why you think we only have one life.

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  • Merry
    Lv 7
    6 months ago

    You can be her friend - but you can’t be her reason for living.

    Phone her parents

    Phone the Crisis Assessment & Treatment Team (In Australia this is referred to as the CATT team)

    https://www.healthdirect.gov.au/crisis-management

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