can a mother divorce her husband and marry someone then have that person adopt a child even though she doesn't have custody?

my mother and father split when I was a baby. my father had custody of us 3 children because he could support us and was a military veteran. she was unemployed and couldn't support us. my mother married someone and that person adopted us three children, my question is, is the adoption legit? I've had his last name all my life and now I'm not sure if he is technically my step dad anymore because my mom and my stepdad split as well. any help would be awesome

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  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    6 months ago

    Your father would have had to give his permission and give up his parental rights for this adoption to be legal.

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  • 6 months ago

    Your Step Dad could NOT have had permission to adopt if your Mother didn't have custody, or your Dad's permission. . Even to just have your names changed (without an adoption) she would have needed your dad's permission. She can choose to call you by her second husband's name but your legal surname is still that which you were born with.

    I strongly suspect that she has't been telling you the truth.

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  • 6 months ago

    If your father gave up all rights to you and your siblings and agreed to allow your Stepfather to adopt you.. then your bio-Dad retained zero legal obligations or rights to you at all. And paid zero child support. If all that happened then your stepfather is legally your father and your bio father is nothing other than the sperm donor. Your father and your ex-stepfather could, possibly, have come to that decision. You give us no hint of why that would have happened. However, if it did, your stepfather remains your legal Father regardless of the decisions made afterwards between him and your Mom. If it did, then there is a clear legal paper trail. And for school and such, since your legal name is not the name on your birth certificate.. that paper trail IS available. If your legal last name is the name on your birth certificate, then this entire story is all mixed up. They don't change names on birth certificates.

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  • Ana
    Lv 6
    6 months ago

    Your mom sounds like a jerk. Your dad is an honorable man serving his country and deserved a lot better

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  • Anonymous
    6 months ago

    No one can POSSIBLY know if the adoption was “legit” without seeing the legal paperwork.

    BOTH parents have to consent to the adoption unless the Court strips one or both parents of his/her/their legal rights. Your birth father would have had to have signed his permission AND your adoptive father would have had to agree to provide all financial support for you. Once you were adopted you had no legal tie to your bio father.

    If he adopted you he’s your father, not your stepdad.

    If he didn’t adopt you and is divorced from your mother he’s your FORMER stepdad.

    This is confusing. Your father had custody but your mother married “someone” and that person adopted you? Not possible.

    A name change ALSO requires the permission of both parents. Is it possible that your birth father agreed to a name change but not an adoption? Yes, but that makes little sense.

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  • 6 months ago

    The law says that, if a step parent wants to adopt their spouse's child, then the biological parent has to sign off on all legal rights to the child. Or if the parent can't be located, an announcement used to be put into newspapers and letters sent to the parent's last known address. If they never respond, then after a certain period of time, i do believe the Courts will grant the adoption.

    This is how it was always done through the legal system. If your adoption didn't go through the Courts, then it's not legit. You can probably get a copy of adoption papers from the Clerk of Courts in the county where the adoption took place, if there was one at all.

    If there was no legal adoption then you're not using your legal name.

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  • 6 months ago

    not without legal custody. I had to become emancipated from mum mother at 13 bc of behavior like this. my father died when I was 8 months old and being his eldest son he left everythignto me, including the very ,large dowry my mothers american family gave him to marcher anndelevate her socially. She remarried twice before I was emnciapte, and not theme were really low class rich jews. she tried to change my name to their naMES and they were living in my homes that I paid to maintain I tried to reason with her but she wouldn't stop so I had to cut her off from all my wealth and ii even had to sue her bc she was still using our family name after having married and divorced two lower class jews,

    • Judith
      Lv 6
      6 months agoReport

      Well, thank goodness someone stepped in and marcher anndelevate. I personally hate it when that doesn't happen. I know what you mean about this lower class jews. She remarried twice before you were emnciapte. Didn't spend any of your inheritance on an education, I see.

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  • Anonymous
    6 months ago

    Yes, it's quite legitimate. Your mother remained your mother and her remarriage meant she and her partner could provide you with a secure home. If the adoption went through the proper channels, it's legal.

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