2 children at home, bf and I are at each other’s necks?

I have 14 month old and newborn. He works so I can stay home. 14 month old is not i. daycare nor ever was so he has his moments and newborn is colicky. He doesn’t even want to hold her when she’s like this. He barely hangs out with her. He takes shower at night but takes it for an hr and while she’s crying I can’t... show more I have 14 month old and newborn. He works so I can stay home. 14 month old is not i. daycare nor ever was so he has his moments and newborn is colicky. He doesn’t even want to hold her when she’s like this. He barely hangs out with her. He takes shower at night but takes it for an hr and while she’s crying I can’t get their bottles washed. Last “ night feeding” before bed he will do (only feeding he does, he’s home for 2 them) After feeding her, he won’t put her in our room because he needs his sleep. This makes harder on me because we have cats and I do so many bottles and have to check on her so it makes my time longer.
He complains house is not up to par, it’s not dirty just toys in designated areas which i won’t put away until end night because my son will destroy it again. Mind you he praises me for having patience dealing with cry of newborn and cooking and everything else. Yet he has moments and shyts on me.
I don’t know how to talk to him cu he thinks it’s not hard, he contradicts himself but when i go out once to grab coffee or food shopping he tells me not to take too long. Mind you he’s out of the house 10 hrs day and doesn’t contribute to when he gets home
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