Is there a way that I can find peace in this loneliness without feeling resent and a creeping hate towards women?

Am a 23 year old guy, and i’ve always wanted female friends, always wanted a girlfriend, always wanted to have my first kiss, always wanted to be in a relationship, and my own family in the future, but women were never even apart of my life to begin with. I’ve asked 4 girls out, and got rejected. Am always alone and am deeply frustrated, but I try to not show it when am outside. When I think about this problem and the fact that there hasn’t been one girl that’s liked me in all my 23 years of life, I feel overwhelmed and consumed in thought, and I notice a creeping feeling of hate coming from my heart, it’s very tempting to give into it, and I keep trying to remind myself that women have done nothing to me, women don’t owe me anything just like how I don’t owe them anything, but am always alone, and i become lost in thought. I feel like am going to be single forever, and part of it makes me angry, but am not sure who am angry at, the fact that i am not good enough for someone to date me or the fact that no woman has ever given me a chance at a date. I just want to be at peace without feeling any negativity about being single all my life every time. I desire women a lot, but dwelling on the fact that no woman has ever desired me all my life freaking hurts, and it’s hard to take my mind off from this. Does anyone have any ideas on how i can deal with this issue.

24 Answers

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  • 8 months ago

    I m sure you re a good person it s just someone hasn't realized that. Why not try to find women whom share the same interests as you.

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  • 8 months ago

    There are many lonely people out there, and "four" is not an exhaustive search. If you get to 100 and you are still single, let's talk again. 

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  • Trish
    Lv 5
    8 months ago

    You'll meet someone don't give up four no's is not that bad. Keep trying see how many years you get out of one hundred because that's all you should focus on the yes. You don't want a girl who says no. There's someone for everyone.

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  • 8 months ago

    You just need to learn how to date without getting rejected.Try this:

    1)Always start by looking for the women who are interested in you to start with. Those women are the ones who look at you and they smile at you.Some might just stare at you.Those ones are your choices right from the start. It should always be mutual interest between you and a woman.

    2)If a woman doesn’t notice you it means she is not interested in you.Sometimes,it means you aren’t their type.Move on.Don’t approach them.You will get rejected. Always move on straight away or you'll miss out on other women.Maybe your perfect woman.

    3)Smile back at those women who look at you and they smile at you and say "Hi" or "Hey".

    4)Then go over and introduce yourself to her.Just say:"Hi,my name is.....,I just wanted to meet you".

    5)Find out her name by asking her what her name is.

    6)The best topic to talk to a woman is her.Start by getting to know her.You are trying to bring a new person into your life.Ask her questions about herself so you get to know all about her.Ask a lot of questions over 3 or 4 dates.It shows her you are interested in her. Find out about her sooner not later.And,if you find out if you are either on the same page or aren’t compatible you move on sooner.

    7)She should ask you questions about yourself so she can get to know all about you too.It shows she is interested in you too.

    8)There are certain things you need to look for from the first moment you meet:

    a)Her good qualities.

    b)The compatibility between you and her.Its about what you and a woman have in common.

    c)Warning signs. The things you don’t want to put up with.The deal breakers.Divorce courts are full of them.

    d)You need to know what you want in the future,(eg:marriage,family of your own,etc.)There are some women who wont date a guy who doesn’t know what they want in their future.

    e)What you and her don’t have in common.

    9)At some point you and a woman will find out if you and them are compatible/have a lot in common or not. If you do,continue seeing them.If not,call it a day and move on,start searching again.Have standards.Learn about someone sooner not later.You can move on quicker if things aren’t right.

    10)At some point after you and a woman have been chatting for awhile you should take it to the next level and get to know each further.Exchange contact details,and,even go out afterward to spend more time with each other.

    11)Get in contact with her within 24 hours by phone,not text (no later). Arrange a date.Have a quick chat.

    12)Meet for that date.1 hour is sufficient.Get to know each other.

    That ought to help you.Good luck.

    • Merce8 months agoReport

      Wow ... amazing. You certainly helped me understand a lotta crucial things. Thanks bro!

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  • GEEGEE
    Lv 7
    8 months ago

    You don't say how you are meeting women, which could perhaps be a factor in why you haven't connected with any yet. Often a good way to meet potential romantic partners is through someone you know. They would know you well and ideally know the other person too so would know about shared interests, etc..... Siblings, friends, cousins..... put the word out that you want to meet someone and see what progresses.

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  • Alan H
    Lv 7
    8 months ago

    Maybe your approach needs adjusting.

    How would hatred help your situation?

    • Kenny8 months agoReport

      I know it won’t. I just feel so left behinde.

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  • Orla C
    Lv 7
    8 months ago

    You might want to reset your thinking. You've been rejected by 4 girls. How many did you ask out?

    And also, you're focusing on girls only for the sexual relationship thing. Stop. We are not vessels for your sperm. We are PEOPLE. Change your focus, see the person, respond to the person, you'll get a much better reaction.

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    • 8 months agoReport

      You get embarrassed too easily if we say too much in public settings and then you never want to see us again because of it. You always want to look like you're goody two shoes in front of everyone when that is proven to not be the case when your boyfriend / husband starts opening his mouth too much.

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  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    8 months ago

    You're dangerously close to sliding into inceldom, which is a dangerous place to be. At this point just finding a woman willing to date you isn't going to fix your underlying beliefs about yourself. So get into counseling and work on the things that might make you unattractive to the opposite sex. These would include things like hygiene, weight and your cadence when you speak. Women by nature have higher emotional IQs than men and they can smell both desperation and hostility (neither of which are turn ons). The rage you feel toward women is likely written all over your face when you try to talk to them. This makes them fear you. Work on yourself and then everything else will fall into place.

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    • Kenny8 months agoReport

      Why are you so sure that if i’m dating i won’t feel better? I like how you just discarded the only solution based on your assumptions.

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  • Anonymous
    8 months ago

    Instead of focusing about women, focus on yourself, career, goals, and just enjoy life. Your 23 years old your still young. Love yourself first. I was enjoying life in my early 20s. It's not the end of the world.

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    • 8 months agoReport

      There you go. She's exposed as not truly being able to relate to you.or having ever really gone through ****.

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  • Anonymous
    8 months ago

    You need to elementary school and then finish high school. Your grammar shows you are about 7yrs old, not in your 20s. Once you a grown-up you can think of being with women, you are too little now. Most people in their 20s know not to start a sentence with AM.

    Grammar fail catches a troll again. Grammar matters

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Gv0H-vPoDc

    Youtube thumbnail

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    • sparrow
      Lv 7
      8 months agoReport

      Why are you so petty and hateful over grammar? The poor guy pours his heart out over his problems, and all you can do is insult him over grammar? Very strange.

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