My husband stopped killimg spiders for me, how should I handle this?
For a long time now my husband will get angry if I ask him to kill a spider, especially at night. This evening, he got angry again and refused until a few hours later when he finally understood it was in our bedroom. I told him who knows where it could be by now. It is really selfish of to be willing to kill it only if it is in the room he is in. This might sound so dumb, but I am very terrified of those creatures and my husband has always known this. Now I can't sleep and need to vent anonymously... How should I handle his attitude about this?
- FoofaLv 78 months ago
Handle your own spiders, Madame. I'm a wife and also happen to be the spider-killer-in-chief around our house. If you can't stand to just pick them up with a tissue then get a broom. Your husband is probably sick of this because you're acting out some of the lamest stereotypes about females not being capable of daily tasks. Man up, Sister.
- AkeathLv 78 months ago
If it were me, I would ask him politely and then promise that you will do something that he doesn't like doing himself in return for his help. And make sure he knows that you appreciate all he does. If it feels like you are mutually helping and supporting each other in different ways and he also gains something from this, he might respond better.
Also, see about spraying your home for bugs - do a full spray around the walls, windows, doors, along the walls where they meet the ceiling and floor, etc. and if you buy a quality product like Ortho Home Defense it will create a perimeter and keep the spiders out of your home so your husband doesn't have to kill them individually all the time. Do see if your husband will help with this, though, as sometimes existing spiders will flee once they sense the poison and that might freak you out if you have to do it. Then do him an especially big favor in return for spraying.
- .Lv 78 months ago
Try therapy, that's how most people deal with phobias (unreasonable fears).
- Suzy QLv 78 months ago
You say 'especially at night' and 'in our bedroom'. Am I reading this correctly? Are you actually waking the poor guy up in the middle of the night to kill a spider for you?
No wonder he gets angry. This kind of helpless behaviour might have been cute when you met, but I can imagine it getting old pretty soon. Especially when it's starting to interfere with his sleep.
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- robert xLv 78 months ago
learn to love spiders because they are very important part of ecology.
- 8 months ago
Buy insecticides or call a company that handles pests. You don't have to kill spiders by hand.
Regarding his attitude, well, maybe he wants you to overcome your fear of spiders. And it's not his job actually to kill spiders for you, right? He also got problems of his own. So, what you should do is to take it care of yourself.
- sunshine_melLv 78 months ago
Try hypnotherapy to help you deal with your phobia.
- choko_canyonLv 78 months ago
I can tell you exactly how to handle it, but only if you stop venting anonymously. Anonymity has no place here.
- HannahLv 68 months ago
Spiders and bugs creep me right out too, especially when its wasps. I just use a fly swatter or rolled up newspaper if the boyfriend isn't around.
- PetterLv 78 months ago
You should hook yourself up for some KBT.