Anonymous asked in Pregnancy & ParentingParenting · 9 months ago

Raising a child that's not yours. ?

The dad split before the child was born and the mother was considering abortion/adoption but after all the attention she and her new boyfriend decided to keep him! Well, We are the aunt and uncle. I have kept him off and on in his first months. I had him his first birthday and first christmas. I have had him for a entire solid year and his second birthday is coming up. So I have had him his entire life basically. The mother has came around this entire year 3 times at best and that's only because she rode down with her mom. She has always said she is getting there (her and her bf)  life together meanwhile they are house jumping and mooching off people. Neither have found a job and dont want a job. She got pregnant and had a new baby within the year of me raising her son. They, I guess are raising this baby while I am potty training and stressing over terrible twos with her very soon to be two year old son and when I finally opened up to how I feel she threatened me with he is my son and I will be soon coming for him I'm only doing what's best for him right now. She never calls him to talk to him even though she always has a phone on her hand.

They all chain smoke in the house all day, They sell pills for money and food stamps, there's random ppl in and out the house all day. I'm scared because I love this little boy with my entire heart but when written on paper I cant afford him either?? Is what any judge would think..   I dont know what to do!

3 Answers

  • 9 months ago

    I fail to see what your question is here?

    It's clear to me that neither of his parents have any interest in raising him, nor are they mature enough to put HIS needs ahead of their own! She may have given birth to him, but in every sense of the true word YOU are his mother! You are the one constant in his life, you are there for every milestone of it, you have given him a roof over your head for the past 2 years etc.

    I really don't think you have anything to worry about here, the egg donor (and that's what I will call her) has no interest in her child, she would rather screw her boyfriend/do drugs/sell pills than be a parent, I don't see any of that changing anytime soon. Even IF she were to come back and claim custody, you could fight her for sole, and she really wouldn't have a legal ground to stand on, no judge would give that child back to a mother who is living in a **** infested rathole, one who is high/drunk most of the time, one who is heavily into dealing drugs.... come on!

    You are that boys parent, biology be damned.

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  • 9 months ago

    if theyre selling pills for money and food stamps i would turn them in for that

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  • Tulip
    Lv 7
    9 months ago

    Why did you allow yourself to get into this ridiculous situation? Why haven't you contacted the authorities? And for crying out loud why are you "potty training" a child under two??

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