Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 month ago

I slapped my gf's teenage son because he got suspended for kissing a girl forcefully. She supports me doing that, but was I too harsh?

We're both 35 years old, and my gf had a teenage pregnancy. Her husband left her after that, and she raised him on her own. For the past three years, I've dated her. 6 months ago, they moved into my home. Her son's now 17, and I like him a lot. He looks at me as a father figure, and we get along well. 

His behaviour at school for the past year or so has troubled us. We just thought it was troublesome teen years. He began to swear at his mother, but since he moved into my home, I always responded to that by taking him by the arm to his room and ordering him to stay there all day. It stopped his swearing very quickly. At school on Friday, we were called to the principal's office and told he smacked a girl on the buttocks, spun her around by the neck and kissed her against her will. They suspended him for a week and said if happened again he would be expelled. We were both outraged. 

I drove home, told him to call his girlfriend to our house. When she arrived, I made him stand in front of her and slapped him across the face. It was a hard slap, I could see my fingerprints on his cheek. "Explain to her why you got slapped,". I put my hand under his chin and turned his face to her as he repeated what had happened, tears streaming down his face. When he finished, I gave his face another slap, just as hard, and sent him to his room. My intention was to embarrass him in front of his gf to teach him a lesson. 

Did he deserve it? After all if he was 18 police could get involved!

11 Answers

Relevance
  • 1 month ago
    Best answer

    He sexually assaulted someone, so that's not harsh at all. If he were a kid like 5 years old it would be WAY too harsh, but he's nearly an adult.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    This was completely inappropriate, even if you were his father. Or his stepdad. But no, you're just a boyfriend.

    I believe you when you say you're trying to be a father figure, but I have to wonder how many "father figures" this kid has had in his life. The fact that he's acting out is proof he's not a healthy, well balanced teen. You wanted to be the hero and resolve this, and all you did was make it worse. Same with mom.

    No wonder today's teens are so messed up.

  • 1 month ago

    Hope that you enjoy the Bible based article that I left. Have a nice day.

    https://www.jw.org/en/library/books/happy-family/

  • 1 month ago

    So he used violence, so you used violence against him????? Then you ask if you were too harsh???

    Seems like you're just teaching violence is the answer. Violence is almost always WRONG.

    Talking about it is what would have been the correct response in my mind. Why do you think it's OK to pressure or force a girl to kiss you? Do you think that's right? etc.

  • What do you think of the answers? You can sign in to give your opinion on the answer.
  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    i wouldnt have slapped him, you could get in trouble for doing that

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    You're a terrible father figure. Slapping a teenager who behaves badly teaches him that hitting other people is okay, that whoever's got the most power gets to harm others, and lots of other garbage that will lead directly to additional bad decisions.

    Source(s): Raised four boys. Never slapped one.
  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Yeesh. Six months is obviously WAY too soon for this woman and her son to be living with you and for you to be disciplining her child. But clearly she's trying to force a family situation and isn't the world's greatest parent to begin with. So if you really want to know how to do the right thing... You and she would get this kid into some adolescent counseling IMMEDIATELY while you both go take a parenting class together. All you've done thus far is teach this kid that might makes right and that violence is acceptable.

  • 1 month ago

    The Police would be far more likely to get involved with someone under eighteen being assaulted than over, surely?

  • 1 month ago

    well teach him slapping someone who your a farther figure to just proves your too lazy to teach him it also teaches him to think it's alright to hit people just talk to him ask him why he did it and tell him to apologies to the girl

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Cool story,bro .I love all the details.😉

Still have questions? Get answers by asking now.