Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 11 months ago

Reaction after I found out my dad has another child not from the same mother?

Many years after my parent's divorce, it turns out that I'm not the last child of my father. Is it something bothering? Never met in real with half sibling. This isn't discussed while I was growing up.

3 Answers

  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    11 months ago

    I can see how that might be shocking. If you and this other child are both adults you might try to contact that person to see if they'd like to meet you. But if this other kid is still a kid and your father's made no attempt to introduce you it could be that he doesn't want you to meet. In which case just wait until this child grows up.

  • .
    Lv 5
    11 months ago

    Does this woman and your half sibling want to meet you? You do have the last word on this, and if you're not ready, don't bother.

    This is one of those sticky situations where you would rather forget that this person exists, it's up to you, and it's not up to anyone whether or not you meet this half sibling or not. Both decisions are right. If you can't handle it, then don't, if you wish to meet this new person, then that's okay too.

    Your father having a mistress and getting her pregnant was the action that was not right. I would not consider that other child the youngest, I would continue to consider  myself as the youngest in the family and the half sibling as "The Other" since your father has 2 families one with your family and another from another time.

    I know how you feel, my father was cheating on my mother with one of her good friends, when he moved in with her I was had already been married for 12 years and was expecting my 2nd child. She hated these 2 facts of my life and took it out on me.

    Now you're lucky that your father cheating on your mother wasn't right in your face, and taken out on you and your children.

    I wouldn't blame you if you disregard your father's mistress and her child.

    It would be a lot less pressure on you.

    Cheers and I hope this family issue works out for the best.

  • 11 months ago

    Of course its natural to have some feelings when you find out your parent has another child, whether that was during the marriage to your Mum or after. Perhaps more so if you had always thought of yourself as the "youngest" kid, and its no longer true.

    None of that actually changes who you are though, so please don't take it too deeply to heart. I gather there was very little or no contact with your Dad after the split since you didn't know about the half sibling. .

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