How can I help my sister?

I have a question about my sister and niece. 7 months ago, their husband/father passed away. It's been hard, but they're moving on. My niece (23) still got married this summer, they both went back to work, things started to seem normal again. They live here in the US, but they lived in Australia until 2 years ago. They go back twice a year: spring and Christmas. My sister announced that when they go this month, she's having his ashes buried. Not in the city where they lived/always go to, but the city where she and he met. Hundreds of miles away from each other. My niece is really upset since they don't really go to that city. I refuse to take sides, but I get it. My niece and her husband live pretty close to my sister, so she goes there a lot. They are the closest mother/daughter duo I've ever seen. Well since the burial announcement, my niece has been going there almost every night, and raising holy hell. She's always respected her mom and been kind and sweet. Now she's being as rude as she possibly can, and she keeps hiding the urn. She's never acted like this. My sister just sends her home. She doesn't know what else to do. I receive calls from both ends. The other night my sister told her not to come back until she fixed her attitude. So last night I got a call from my niece because she misses her mom. She was sobbing! I told her to stop acting up, accept it, and then she can see her mom. What can I do to bring them together again before the trip? Or how can I help?

3 Answers

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  • 1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    I agree with the other response - this clearly means a lot to both of them, and they should split the ashes.  It's not uncommon at all to do this.

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  • 1 month ago

    Mind your own business

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  • Aa
    Lv 4
    1 month ago

    Split the ashes. The widow can bury her half wherever she wants. The daughter can keep her half.

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