Anonymous
Anonymous asked in HealthWomen's Health · 1 month ago

I feel emptiness and a craving to be filled when masturbate?

Hi I am a 21 year old female virgin. I masturbate about 3 times a day (no penetration) I find myself really upset and sometimes I even cry I long for something deeper inside of me if that makes sense but I fear penetration and I fear having sex ...

So the question is do other people feel this way we masturbating and how do you get over fear of sex/penetration

17 Answers

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  • Sky
    Lv 7
    1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    Why not just buy a dildo?  Start small, and when you get more used to it, work your way up to bigger ones.  You get over such fears by actually doing it, and when you have a dildo you are in complete control over how fast, how deep, how long and thick (when you purchase), how much lube is used, etc.

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  • 1 month ago

    Maybe practice with a small dildo or vibrator?

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  • 1 month ago

    You've got to get over this fear if you ever want to live a normal sex life.  I'd make it a point to get something long enough and smooth enough to be able to reach and tear the hymen with little pain.

    • TheBellJar
      Lv 7
      1 month agoReport

      It is dangerous to just "use something" hospitals get a lot of patients with things stuck inside them. It's needs to be a proper vibrator and why buy a dildo when you can buy a vibrator.

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  • 1 month ago

    Yep you need something back there for that muscle to clamp down on. Don't you have any decent looking male friends? I'm pretty sure 1 of them would gladly do it for you. It would probably make his life. Most hymens are not that hard to pop as a matter of fact it is very flimsy, you can do it with your finger, just make sure it is clean and moist, you can put your saliva on it, saliva is very slick or lots of girls use a hair brush and just use the handle end. Now if you are really concerned about the pain, have the guy lie on the bed and you get on top and tell him to let you make it go in. get it lined up with your vaginal opening and sit down on it. It will be over just like snapping your fingers.Then you can ease up and down on it till it gets to feeling good then start moving faster and it may get to feeling great. You should be able to tell where you need his penis to go to, to feel the best. Make sure he wears a condom and if you don't want to get on top on him, lie on the bed let him get on top of you, if he is inexperienced tell him to take his hand and put it against your vaginal opening, you don't want him thrusting into your vulva, he's got to hit the hole and then he should give 1 thrust and then he should be there. It would be better for to have an experienced male but you might get something else for them. You could get yourself an 8 inch vibrator, you don't have to put it all in, just use what you want.

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  • 1 month ago

    One option might be to get a dilator set (basically a set of dild0s that start very small and narrow, and work up to bigger - allowing you to gently stretch yourself).

    You don't have to go crazy, because most men's penises aren't that big - although they do vary greatly in length and girth.

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  • juliet
    Lv 5
    1 month ago

    I’m around the same age as you, and this is something I understand. I had bad experiences with penetration (tampons, gyno exams, ultrasounds), and so I had not necessarily a “fear”, but a foreboding feeling about my first time. Needless to say, I had my first time very recently and it was definitely tough intitially, but now it’s great. When you’re with someone you trust, and someone who cares about you, you’ll relax and be turned on enough for penetration to be a great experience.

    If you feel like your fear is getting the best of you, feel free to talk to your gyno about it.

    • TheBellJar
      Lv 7
      1 month agoReport

      gyno exams were way worse for me than normal penetration although they aren't supposed to be the smears were incredibly painful for me but not for other women. But now because I didn't get regular smears I have to have four organs taken out of me.

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  • 1 month ago

    It is quite common for virgins to feel this way. You could try pushing your fingers in or using a dildo

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    You need to seek therapy.  That is NOT normal.  Crying over sex and fearing intimacy are real reasons to seek professional help.

    • juliet
      Lv 5
      1 month agoReport

      This fear is normal. I had it, and turned out perfectly fine after I experienced sex. Stop this non sense

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  • MissA
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    This is oddly 1970’s smut. 

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    No, I don't think too many other people feel "emptiness", or cry about it, that's your own thing. But there are others who fear penetration. Have you tried using tampons during your periods? That might give you some practice at inserting things inside you.

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