I feel emptiness and a craving to be filled when masturbate?
Hi I am a 21 year old female virgin. I masturbate about 3 times a day (no penetration) I find myself really upset and sometimes I even cry I long for something deeper inside of me if that makes sense but I fear penetration and I fear having sex ...
So the question is do other people feel this way we masturbating and how do you get over fear of sex/penetration
- SkyLv 79 months agoFavourite answer
Why not just buy a dildo? Start small, and when you get more used to it, work your way up to bigger ones. You get over such fears by actually doing it, and when you have a dildo you are in complete control over how fast, how deep, how long and thick (when you purchase), how much lube is used, etc.
- RichardLv 69 months ago
Maybe practice with a small dildo or vibrator?
- geetarman56Lv 79 months ago
You've got to get over this fear if you ever want to live a normal sex life. I'd make it a point to get something long enough and smooth enough to be able to reach and tear the hymen with little pain.
- Ace ShortyLv 79 months ago
Yep you need something back there for that muscle to clamp down on. Don't you have any decent looking male friends? I'm pretty sure 1 of them would gladly do it for you. It would probably make his life. Most hymens are not that hard to pop as a matter of fact it is very flimsy, you can do it with your finger, just make sure it is clean and moist, you can put your saliva on it, saliva is very slick or lots of girls use a hair brush and just use the handle end. Now if you are really concerned about the pain, have the guy lie on the bed and you get on top and tell him to let you make it go in. get it lined up with your vaginal opening and sit down on it. It will be over just like snapping your fingers.Then you can ease up and down on it till it gets to feeling good then start moving faster and it may get to feeling great. You should be able to tell where you need his penis to go to, to feel the best. Make sure he wears a condom and if you don't want to get on top on him, lie on the bed let him get on top of you, if he is inexperienced tell him to take his hand and put it against your vaginal opening, you don't want him thrusting into your vulva, he's got to hit the hole and then he should give 1 thrust and then he should be there. It would be better for to have an experienced male but you might get something else for them. You could get yourself an 8 inch vibrator, you don't have to put it all in, just use what you want.
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- River EuphratesLv 79 months ago
One option might be to get a dilator set (basically a set of dild0s that start very small and narrow, and work up to bigger - allowing you to gently stretch yourself).
You don't have to go crazy, because most men's penises aren't that big - although they do vary greatly in length and girth.
- :)Lv 59 months ago
I’m around the same age as you, and this is something I understand. I had bad experiences with penetration (tampons, gyno exams, ultrasounds), and so I had not necessarily a “fear”, but a foreboding feeling about my first time. Needless to say, I had my first time very recently and it was definitely tough intitially, but now it’s great. When you’re with someone you trust, and someone who cares about you, you’ll relax and be turned on enough for penetration to be a great experience.
If you feel like your fear is getting the best of you, feel free to talk to your gyno about it.
- KayleenRLv 79 months ago
It is quite common for virgins to feel this way. You could try pushing your fingers in or using a dildo
- Anonymous9 months ago
You need to seek therapy. That is NOT normal. Crying over sex and fearing intimacy are real reasons to seek professional help.
- MissALv 79 months ago
This is oddly 1970’s smut.
- Anonymous9 months ago
No, I don't think too many other people feel "emptiness", or cry about it, that's your own thing. But there are others who fear penetration. Have you tried using tampons during your periods? That might give you some practice at inserting things inside you.