Should I file for child support?

My daughters father lived an hour away and saw his daughter twice a week. He then moved three hours away to “live the way he wants to live”. He pays $100 a week...sometimes. He gets behind because he spends his money in Nike clothes or for example, to go to Mardi Gras. He is constantly shorting me. I would like to file for support but I’m afraid I may get less than what I get now. I work full time and pay for daycare and everything she needs. He works and barely makes it. He has another child and he only pays 150 a month for him. This is in the state of Iowa. I’m also afraid that if I file, he could be able to take her with him for visitation and I’d have to meet him halfway. I don’t want to disrupt her life like that. 

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  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    3 months ago

    If child support awards are that low in your state you may not benefit financially from codifying your support situation. However, minus any kind of a court order on custody he could basically just grab the kid and take her to his place and you'd have no recourse to call the police. You at least need to get your custody agreement in place. Yes, if he asks for visitation he'll likely get it. But without that you can't claim custodial interference should he someday decide he wants her full time. You can file for a custody arrangement without asking for child support.

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  • 3 months ago

    Dear, of course you should file for child support and full custody.

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  • Anonymous
    3 months ago

    Here is how child support is calculated in Iowa.  Punch in the figures and you will see what you will be awarded:  https://secureapp.dhs.state.ia.us/customerweb/reso...

    In MY State the first custodial parent to apply for support gets a percentage of the other parent's income.  The second parent to file gets a smaller percentage and so forth down the line.

    My BIGGER concern is that without the Order he could take your daughter where he lives and not bring her back.  His rights at this moment are the same as yours.  You could do the same.

    I would file for custody/visitation/support just to be certain my child returns home after every visit.

    Visitation is immaterial when it comes to support.  They are separate issues but can be heard in one petition.

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  • 3 months ago

    You might just threaten him about taking him to court and him having to pay it, that way they would know that he is keeping his payments up to date and see if that gives him some impetus to keep your daughters payment up to date.

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  • Anonymous
    3 months ago

    First, pls ignore the answer saying it's based on how often he sees the child.  That's rubbish.  It's based on his salary and every state has guidelines on how this is computed..  You need to talk to an attorney.  For now, it's just a one-time visit to learn your options.  For example, I don't know where you're getting the idea  you'd need to meet him halfway for visitation if he opts to see the child.  It could end up that the visits need to be in your city, or it could end up he's responsible for pickup and delivery.  You say you don't want to disrupt her life like that, but if it ends up on a regular schedule (like once a month), it's not disruptive and it's always in a child's best interest to interact with both parents.  

    The other consideration is how badly you need the money.  It sounds like you do need it, and the advantage of court ordered support is he can't fall behind or else he'll run into some big consequences (wages garnished, losing DL, etc).

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  • g
    Lv 7
    3 months ago

    This has nothing to do with his other child. Parents are obligated to provide support for their children, as mandated by the court. Whether or not he chooses to take advantage of his visitation rights, your child requires support. That shouldnt be negotiable.

    You have a choice - either go through the court and take the chance he'll also want to pursue visitation when he has court-ordered support payments or accept what he pays you.

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  • 3 months ago

    Well, first off, if you file for child support, there is usually visitation included with that (on a fixed schedule, for example every other weekend, every other holiday for each parent). However, you can ask your Attorney to have a domicile set up for your child. This means, you can specify that the child can't leave her County of residence or the city, etc. If that is ordered by the Court, then your ex will be forced to have visitation in your local area. And won't be able to take her out of the State. Talk with your attorney about setting up a domicile for the child, if you file for child support through the courts, and see what sort of advice you receive from him or her.

    You don't have to meet anyone half way for visitation. The non-custodial parent is responsible for the child's transportation. You're not.

    And if your ex can afford to go to Mardi Gras and buy high-end shoes, i'm sure he can afford to pay child support. Plus, it seems to me he was capable of creating the child, now he has to figure out how to care for her financially. YOU"RE doing it aren't you? Well, he needs to, as well. I'm not sure why you're so concerned about his finances anyway. It seems to me you're paying for the majority of your child's upbringing. Child care alone costs a fortune!

    Seems like you're a great Mom. Take care

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  • 3 months ago

    not sure what county or city you live in , but its usually based on the time he spends with the child and in this case it sounds like almost , not time. Therefore, the less time the more money the supporting parent gets, so you willl end up with more child support, not less

    • g
      Lv 7
      3 months agoReport

      I've never known it to be based on time spent with the child.

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  • Kieth
    Lv 7
    3 months ago

    File for support, the court isn't going to side with his spending habits.

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