Boyfriend makes me feel jealous?
Iv been dating a 22 yr old guy (Jack) for 2 mths now. A while ago he told me I seem to hide my phone when I’m on it & wanted to know who a guy was (his name was on my phone) I said he was a friend.
Jack has hot female friends in real life & all over his Instagram/Snapchat/facebook. One night we were out & he kept going through photos in front of me of him with other girls.
He told me he’s had scenarios in his head of me cheating on him with other guys & other guys making sexual comments about me. My ex works with both of us & jack also said he’s had the thought of me being with him on his mind. Jacks told me he's been insecure in the past. I’m also his first real girlfriend.
I was on jacks bed on my phone & he came up next to me & liked a hot girls Instagram pic in front of me. He started mentioning one of the pretty girls name at work constantly till I got annoyed & started mentioning my ex.
A few times recently he has opened up apps on his phone to show me something & he has had big booby plastic blondes on there.
Im blonde & flat chested but I know I am somewhat attractive but I notice jack is doing these things more & more & it’s now starting to make me feel insecure & sad to the point I don’t want to be around him anymore.
We still haven’t had sex yet & he says he loves my body but the more he does these things the less I want to have sex with him.
I’m 26 & he says he adores everything about me, but I can’t deal with this anymore.
What do I do?
- snwflk11.09Lv 61 month agoFavourite answer
You dump that jerk, that's what you do. Accusations of "hiding your phone" is a huge red flag waving at you. Not to mention his hypocritical use of photos on his own social media.
- Care411Lv 64 weeks ago
You are a troll, right?
You seem pretty pretty and insecure. Most people ( men & women) like boobs. Most people are ashamed & embarrassed about sexuality. Clearly he is not, you should like that. He has good taste in women too as he likes hot chicks. Why wouldn't you have sex with him? You should
You know what lady. Fu*k jack in the pu$$y. There should be nothing with your man liking boobs. The problem you shouldnt be feeling jealous. He should be drooling over your t*ts and making other men jealous of you. Boys make their jealous, men make other men jealous. Heard that saying?
You should be allowed to look at other men or women and the same for him. If he is with you, hes with you. The problem is hes not making you feel sexy or like his girl. Who cares why hes doing this he is.... Hit him in the head with a frying pan.
PS a guy who endlessly accuses his girl of cheating on him when shes not is probably cheating on her.
- FoofaLv 71 month ago
"Jack" is a controlling b-tard and this very likely will escalate to coercive control and physical violence if you don't end it. You feeling insecure is part of the plan, just in case you can't see that. The lower your self esteem the easier you are to control.
- KherovaLv 71 month ago
I would have a talk about what is ok and what isn't. People have different ideas about what crosses a line, and it is good to work it out so that it is clear. You don't have to exactly match, but you should be close. My ex didn't like that I watched porn, but she was cheating on me, so go figure. That said, she was pretty jealous. I think sometimes people cheat because they are worried the other person will, so they just do it first as a preemptive strike (because they are sure the other will if they haven't already).
As far as him being interested in women that have things you don't, I wouldn't worry too much about that. It can be healthy to have a fantasy life, as long as he realizes where the boundaries are, and sticks to them. There is a big difference between fantasy and reality, and just because he likes looking at that, doesn't mean he doesn't prefer you irl. I would love to drive a Ferrari, but I wouldn't want it to be my car for long. Expensive, not practical for carying stuff, always worried about it getting scratched. In fantasy, it is great, in reality, I would much rather have something that is more of a total package car. He likes you for more than just your looks, so your total package is worth more to him than the one dimension those pics offer.
Also, for cheaters it isn't always about looks. Sometimes they cheat just because they can, or for the thrill. You worrying about girls who are more attractive, might be worrying about the wrong thing. Ultimately his is going to be in one of three categories: never would cheat, is for sure going to cheat, or may cheat if the conditions are right. If he is in the first category, then your jealousy will only lead to a breakup. If he is in the last category, you may drive him to cheat if you are too controlling. There is nothing you can do if he is in the middle category except dump him. Some of it is just going to be you deciding to trust him. Make a reasonable attempt to determine his trustworthiness, then just decide to trust him or not. You have no guarantee, and at some point you just have to roll the dice.
Definitely talk about the what is ok/what is not ok for both of you, though. Get it in the record.
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- PearlLv 71 month ago
maybe you shouldnt be with him then
- ChristianLv 41 month ago
This is why you don’t date people from work...
- 1 month ago
This guy is bonkers. Run away!