Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Social SciencePsychology · 2 months ago

Why do people feel less embarrassed or ashamed when they point out that they're aware of the things they feel people will judge them for?

I do it myself. I will say things like "I know my house is a mess" if I'm kind of embarrassed about someone seeing my messy house or half jokingly apologize for looking like garbage if I'm wearing a baggy t-shirt and no makeup. I guess I like to feel like they're laughing with me instead of at me.

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  • 2 months ago
    Favourite answer

    Lack of self awareness amplifies embarrassment because it alienates you from your audience. If you've got food in your teeth and someone points it out, it's not really embarrassing because you looked weird or disgusting; it's embarrassing because you were unaware of it and the people around you were. Think of Micheal Scott from The Office; watching his character causes so much second hand embarrassment because he has zero self awareness. Nobody around him is relating to him, so he becomes something to be gawked and laughed at (which is kind of what embarrassment is). By telling people you know your house is messy, it's basically letting them know you're in on the joke. They can't be laughing at you, cause you're already laughing with them. 

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  • OTTO
    Lv 6
    2 months ago

    Sounds like you are okay with who you are and are not trying to hide your imperfections.

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  • 2 months ago

    I think it's more pointing it out as if to say they know. That they know, shows they don't care. When people care - they're cleaning/tidying up, as they talk.

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  • L
    Lv 4
    2 months ago

    Because they were NEVER taught, by their parents, to NOT feel this way.  I NEVER apologize for a messy house, the clothes I wear, the car I drive, etc.  If others don't like it - they can keep their thoughts to themselves because I will NEVER change for others........only for myself.

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  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    Because they have not care about people’s opinions.

      At least I don’t 

    Except my wife’s lol

       Opinions r just opinions 

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  • Snoopy
    Lv 6
    2 months ago

    I think you maybe automatically and unconsciously are raising your expectations of others. 

    If I were you I wouldn't pay attention to this feeling and just try to push those negative feelings about yourself aside. Even if what you think of others thinking of you was true then maybe write down what would make you feel differently. 

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  • 2 months ago

    its like bullying...its harder for them to bully you if..they say your a ...and i say nerd...umm yeah.

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  • martin
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    It's an ego thing, but perfectly natural.

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