Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFriends · 1 month ago

Need help finding good friends/people in my life?

I know this is embarrassing going to this site for this, but I'm realizing I've been hanging around bad friends the past year or so and its really dragged me down. I went through a major career change 2 years ago and joined the military, lived abroad serving in Korea for a year and just got back in Feb. But I realize I chose to stay in touch with the wrong people over there and now I feel very isolated and don't really have great friendships in my life

I guess I really don't know where to start, especially in the covid world we're in. I'm about 30 now, and I feel like so many people my age are in serious relationships its hard to find my place. Does anyone have any advice for how I can meet good people or how to avoid getting too ivested with corrupted people? I tend to be too trusting with people early on and get used by them later, so I feel skeptical of now people now even though I don't want to be. Anyone have any advice for what I could do? Thanks

2 Answers

  • 1 month ago
    Favourite answer

    You sound pretty normal to me. You appear to know yourself and your weaknesses fairly well - the result of past experiences - so you'll be quite naturally a little more 'on guard' in the future. It's basic common sense isn't it. You've spent a long time abroad so you've lost touch with your previous way of life which you have just returned to. Your old friends have moved on in their lives while you were away. That's life. Don't lose touch with them - but they aren't going to be with you now as often as maybe they once were 10 or so years ago as you have all moved on down your separate paths. I would suggest you have a look at local college courses - like evening classes - in subjects you are interested in. You might fancy dancing - or language - or DIY. Whatever. You will meet others with similar interests and in small classes you get to know others and end up friendly and perhaps go out for a drink or food after class. Join a social club too - or a gym if you are into fitness. Again - it's somewhere to meet other people of all ages, including your own. Once you have settled into your new regime you'll relax a bit after a month or so. (Remember how you felt with the culture-shock of joining the Military and how long it took you to learn the ropes and relax into it). Good luck

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  • 1 month ago

    It's not hard to change social circumstances. Pick something you're interested in - say gaming or acting or music and look for a group on something like meetup dot com. That's an international forum for people of every interest to find like minded people, all for free. There are too many volunteer organizations to mention that need volunteers - and such organizations usually have large numbers of females volunteering. Even local food coops need volunteers. Most big cities have film festivals. Film festivals need volunteers of all ages, and they are a lot of fun. I'm sure there's someplace out there for you.

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