Am I wrong for not wanting to go to college?

I'm an 18 year old girl graduating high school after this year and have never been more terrified in my life (which I guess is normal.) There are many reasons I don't want to go to college, whereas maybe two reasons I would want to go.

I did some research and figured out that I could support myself on making 30k/year in my area. (I also don't want kids, so hopefully I'll never have to worry about that in my financial future.) I'd like to get a job in the banking or call center industry and work my way up the ladder. I really can't see myself plunging thousands of dollars into debt to get the same job I could with a high school diploma. I also want to take some time to experience/explore life to figure out what I want. (And yes, I'm aware that 90% of kids who take a gap year don't go.)

My mom is very unsupportive and actually kind of cruel about me not wanting to start college right after high school. It's even gotten to the point where she made up fictional college plans to tell my relatives at family gatherings because she's embarrassed. Idk.

It just seems like there's HUGE pressure on me to go to college, find a boy, settle down, etc. People want me to have a traditional lifestyle, but I'm not planning to get married for a VERY long time. It's frustrating when people keep telling me to "get my head out of the clouds."

...Am I wrong? :(

26 Answers

  • 1 month ago
    Favourite answer

    The short answer is NO, you're not wrong. There IS no wrong. There is no RIGHT either. Your life is YOURS. You should do what YOU want to do, no matter what other people say or expect. That can be tough, and you'll face obstacles and opposition no matter what you choose. But college is NOT the be-all and end-all to any life. It's good for some, not good for others. 

    I agree that you should take some time, and explore more before making any decision about how to proceed. I think it's far more valuable to learn from your own experiences than to be told how to think and feel, and maybe just be unhappy. 

    If your mother is making up your life for you, then it's time to put a stop to that if you can. It may not be possible. She has this 'image' of what she wants for you, and it's not YOURS. All you can do is keep telling her that it isn't yours.  But you aren't going to stop her from holding that image in her mind. 

    So my advice is to ignore anything said that is negative to what you want to do with your life, proceed as you want, and don't look back. Either your parents will eventually see that you are your own person, or they won't. Don't try to change them--just go on with your plans and your life without their approval. If they are 'embarrassed' that's their problem. 

  • 1 month ago

    Nothing I never wanted to go to University I wanted a real Job and at 15 I started I have not been Unemployed and retired at 55

  • 1 month ago

    You're not wrong, but that being said, I can understand where your mother's coming from. Of course, parents want the best for their children and sometimes, what they think is best is not actually the best thing to do. Only you know what you want to do. But, if you choose not to go to college, you should make that decision considering all the consequences that come with it.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    if you dont mind working from the way bottom up I think you are fine. remember its going to take years because who knows is someone with a degree will get those positions making you stuck and never moving up. Also remember jobs will move you up but they will not pay you the same as some one who has a degree. I know this from family in IT and business, but i bet all jobs differ. For example my brother has many years experience working in IT, very smart doesnt have degree worked his A off to be where he is at. He thought sticking to a company he will move up and get better paid. That never happened and now he is forever stuck in that same position and pay. He doesnt want to move cause of competition nowadays and regrets not going to school. Also this is why you see many adults going back to school and getting degrees. BUT there are companies that will pay for your school if you plan on keep working for their business. My friend doesnt pay a dime and her company pays all of it but she has to work for that business for quite a while which she doesnt mind. She does though cant take really expensive classes all at once and she has to battle work and school too. There are many factors that could play out, but always make sure you have a plan and trust your plan. 

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  • 1 month ago

    Yes.  By not going to college. you're limiting yourself.  A college degree is a requirement for (1) so many desirable jobs and (2) social acceptance in the middle class.

    Just go.  College is fun in some respects.

  • 1 month ago

    Realistically, how do you expect to move up the ladder when everyone else around you will have better qualifications than you?  Do not expect to get far in banking without a Bachelor's degree.  You might do okay in a call center, but again, why would someone pick a person without a Bachelor's degree over someone with one?

    That being said, college is not absolutely important, but you need some sort of plan.  How are you going to get the skills necessary to move up in your chosen career?  College usually does that for you, but if you are not doing that, you need to find an alternative.  You can learn a trade, you can find someone to apprentice under, or you can find a place that actually provides on-the-job training that you can use to acquire new skills (very rare nowadays).  All that being said however, you are making a fantastic choice financially by holding off getting married.  Except I think you will find $30,000 a year extremely difficult to live on alone.

  • 1 month ago

    You're not "wrong" in not wanting to go to college, if that's really how you feel.

    Some of your reasoning is incorrect, though. I've never really seen any jobs in which having a bachelor's degree wasn't helpful. Even those jobs that don't require a degree often provide greater promotion potential for those with degrees than for those without. 

    Even in fast food, a college degree will immediately put you on a management track, over people without degrees who have worked there for ages. And while you might not need a degree to be an entry level bank or call center employee, you'll be stuck at the entry level forever, while people with degrees are promoted over you. 

  • 1 month ago

    Not wrong, but probably unrealistic. It's very tough to live on your own on $30k/yr, and you probably won't make anywhere near that with only a high school diploma. Bank tellers are a vanishing occupation, and most banks want at least some college even for tellers. Without degree, you probably have NO opportunities for advancement, either. Call centers usually want some technical expertise, e.g. at least an associate's degree in computer science, computer repair. Otherwise, you are replaced by automated calling, bots, etc. 

    You need to think things through a lot more thoroughly & do your homework! Especially pay attention to the impact of technological changes on job opportunities, which jobs/careers are being severely reduced or eliminated.

  • sam
    Lv 5
    1 month ago

    Do your parents want you do go to college this September? In that case you probably missed the boat for everything except possibly community college. So you can take a gap year. A lot of students are choosing to take one thie year becasue they don't want to pay for online learning.

    I would also consider taking a gap year next year, because there will be a much larger pool of applicats applying. All the people who graduate that year will be looking for spaces, as well as the people who took gap years.

    In the meantime, think about the skills you will need to work in a call center or a bank. Public speaking, typing, accounting etc. Take classes in these areas. Try and look for entry level positions. That will be hard in this economy. 

    As a heads up, to work in a bank, you likely will need some kind of higher education, especially if you want to work up the ladder. 

  • 1 month ago

    its so expensive, dont go unless you are sure and dont let anyone tell you a diffrent way. i know many people who have started school at ages 23+ as well, so you have pleanty of time if you change your mind.

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