Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 1 month ago

Should I leave her, or give her another chance?

I guess you can say that I should have seen this one coming, but maybe I’m just crazy because I care too much. Maybe I need a shrink because I don’t trust people that easily. Beyond all this, my problem started last night after the girl who I fell for after four dates and agreed to be exclusive—my idea—with me matched with my fake dating profile. Her reasoning for agreeing to be exclusive was her claim to liking me a lot due to our shared interests, attraction (not very vocal about her attraction to me but we’ve already got to the oral stages by date 4), and minimizing contact due to the current state of affairs (reasonable, right?) You’d think once someone says you’re exclusive you’d delete your dating app. I guess I was wrong. My friends say I should ghost her and never talk to her again...that’s just not my style, though. And, what if I am just over reacting because I asked to soon? Maybe she just doesn’t know and feel comfortable with me yet? Irregardless, I have trust issues...maybe she does too. 

Update:

Last night I went to a bar to console my friend since his family member is in the hospital. I took every preventative measure possible and told her I went. She passively said she doubted I socially distanced others in the place and corrected her. She was short with me until the end saying that I look forward to the date she planned tomorrow. Then she messaged the fake profile.

Update 2:

She said nothing sexual or advancing to the fake. Only commenting on a shared interest. 

4 Answers

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  • Teal
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    You have an active "fake" profile, you aren't in any position to accuse her of dishonesty when you are also lying to her and keeping your options open. Both of you need to make up your minds about what you really want and talk it out. Be clear about what exclusivity means to you and what your expectations are. Dial things back if you need to, you haven't known her that long. Your insecurity and your trust issues are ultimately your own problem. Nobody can fix it for you, only you can decide when you are ready to do the work to overcome this and learn to make yourself vulnerable.

  • Gert
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    I'd move on if I were you.

  • g
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Yes you asked for exclusive way too soon. BUT you found her now on dating site? Matching doesn't means she's necessarily looking - is she active and responding to you? That would be something else altogether.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Why do you want to only tell lies about yourself?  Would you like it if someone else did the same to and with you?

    When people tell lies that are also Sinning!  Why do you want to keep adding more and more sins up against yourself?  The Bible states that only GOD can forgive a sin; and GOD will only forgive a Sin when GOD knows the person will Not ever do that sin again! 

    When is the last time you prayed to GOD?

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