Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 2 months ago

Any advice? ?

My girlfriend and I are both 22. She has abusive parents that constantly threaten to hit her if she does not listen. She said sometimes they hit her sometimes they dont. She says they dont hit her that hard. Well she isnt allowed to leave her house except for once or twice a week. She is kept against her will to stay in the house or else they will verbally abuse her and have made many threats to "beat her ***" if she doesnt listen to them. Shes very kind loving sweet girl that does not deserve that. She says they've been abusive since she was a child. I'm living with my parents right now also I will eventually get a apartment but do to covid I lost my well paying job so I'm stuck at home. Shes finishing college in December to go into healthcare management. I'd understand a curfew which is normal for some families and parents, but she is literally not allowed to go in her front yard or hang out with anyone, she can only go out 1-3 times a week as if shes a prisoner. I mean in the broad day time she is forced to stay inside. This is not acceptable behavior any advice? 

9 Answers

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  • Raja
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    Your gf is an adult .Let her finish her college in December and join Health care Management .There after she can leave her parents and stay in an apartment .Till such time she will have to stay with her parents . 

  • Tj
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    She needs to call the police and when they come to the house, let her press charges on them.

  • 2 months ago

    There are some freaky things going on outside these days.  I went out today and everywhere I went I struggled.  The communist are running amok.  It seems like she is a prisoner to you because you want to court her.  But, social distancing orders are in place and need to be respected.  Until the time comes when you can provide marriage and a home to here, there really isn't anything you can or should do about it.

  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    maybe she should move out and stay with you

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  • 2 months ago

    ask your parents if she can stay at yours then call the police

  • 2 months ago

    I guess your girlfriend has no clue she's of adult age, over 21 years old and can do what she wants to do in her life.  And if she believes she's being abused and oppressed, then she can get the police involved or social services.  

    but honestly, she can leave anytime she wants and the parents can't do a damned thing about it.

  • 2 months ago

    What I would do is report the parents if they are doing that to her. If your girlfriend is an adult like you are, I understand parents still have rules if you live at home even though you're an adult, but you are right, they should not be treating her like a prisoner like you described and so I would definitely talk to authorities about it because your girlfriend may be too afraid to even though she's 22. Often abuse victims are afraid to talk about their abuse and they fear their abusers will abuse them even more if they report them. 

  • 2 months ago

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  • 2 months ago

    Your girlfriend has to move out. If the only way to move out is secretly, she should move out secretly. If she can't take all her stuff, she should take only what she really needs. It will be rough at first, and she may need to sleep on a friend's sofa or find someone whose subletting a room cheaply. Whether she moves out or not, she should see a therapist, and if she has to stay in the awful place where she is, she should work towards spending as little time as possible with her parents by making her room more into her space and taking up new hobbies. Even if her parents are acting nice, she should spend very little time with them. Even if she tries hard, she will not restore the family to what it never was, so she should accept that she cannot be with her parents except for brief times. If they get physically abusive, she can call the police. Also, if the family was open to meeting with a family therapist around these rules that could help the situation, too.

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