Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 month ago

Christian advice: navigating divorce?

I have a friend who I met through a sports club a few years ago. We were never really that close until the start of this year; when she told me her husband of 4 years said their marriage had been the biggest waste of his time, and wanted a separation/divorce as soon as possible. He took all his belongings and moved overseas within a matter of days.

She, her husband and I are all Christian, so I know that although they’re getting a legal divorce in the next year or so, it is not a biblical divorce. 

Over the course of the year she and I have gotten extremely close; we see each other most weekends, we’ve met each other’s families through inviting one another to family functions e.g. weddings, games nights, dinners etc. We have a good time together, we trust one another, but most importantly I’ve always been sure not to put myself in situations where we’re alone for too long, so I try to limit any space for temptation.

Now to the point of my question, I think I am falling for this girl. She consumes my every thought, every prayer I pray is for her happiness and Ive started to care for her so much it hurts. I didn’t plan for any of this, and I don’t know what to do from here. Do I tell her so I can deal with it? Do I pray on it? Or do I call the whole friendship quits to avoid either of us getting hurt. Please, any advice...

4 Answers

  • 1 month ago
    Favourite answer

    The Bible has a lot of wisdom, of course, but it is subject to omissions, mis-translations and misinterpretations, so I wouldn't worry too much about a spiritual problem. Praying is fine, of course, but listen for the answer which might come in an unexpected form. But it's your choice in the end. I'm sure that God wants you to be happy!

    (Tj doesn't actually know what he is talking about, obviously; prayers are answered, but not necessarily in the way we want - otherwise we'd all be rich and in perfect health!)

    Good Luck !

  • 1 month ago

    You two are meeting up regularly, having family outings, Going to huge social events and dining out .... hope you don't catch Covid-19 because you're doing all the things on the list of MOST LIKELY to catch it. You couldn't pick a worse year to long for deepening intimacies with this married woman! 

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Stop believing in fairy tales. Have you ever known a prayer to actually work?  NO.  Its 2020, time for you to start believing science, not some bs book written by some old people in the sand, trying to control the masses.

  • 1 month ago

    Your feelings for her put your friendship in peril.  A.  You risk the friendship by making a move only to find out she isn't interested making for a very awkward future. B. You avoid her and thus end the friendship.  But there is a third choice which requires you to be really honest with yourself.  C.  Realize the only reason she "consumes" you is because you haven't been seeking a romantic interest elsewhere.  If you did, you could focus on that person and thus remain friends.  Granted, C is the tougher choice, but the only one that takes the pressure off the relationship you have established.  Besides you are in the friend zone, and it isn't a easy place to escape.  Pray and perhaps discuss the issue with your pastor.  Good Luck.

Still have questions? Get answers by asking now.