English speakers, could you help me?
I need to translate a creative (poetic) piece of writing describing a work of art but I am not a native English speaker and I am not sure if this sounds natural? I would be grateful if someone helped me and said if I need to change something in this paragraph (this is an except from the paragraph)
No one put a lock without a reason.
Where is the lock, there is something to protect, some treasure or a hidden secret.
- yet-knish!Lv 72 months agoFavourite answer
In addition to Lili's answer, I would say that you probably want the first line to be in present tense--No one puts a lock without a reason. Also technically you shouldn't use 'put' without an object (you put a lock on something), but as it's poetic writing you could probably get away with it. Or you could say 'uses' instead.
- Anonymous2 months ago
"No one puts a lock" -- where?? Do you mean no one "uses" a lock?
Where there IS A lock, there is something to protect, some treasure or some [hidden] secret. Being hidden is part of being a secret.
- LiliLv 72 months ago
We'd need to see the entire poem to know whether this translation works. Preferably, we'd need to see it in the original language.
However, as someone who has much experience with poetry and the English language, I can tell you that the second line should read, "Where there is a lock there is something to protect, some treasure or hidden secret."
You don't need the comma after "lock" there, unless it ends a line of poetry, but you should change "the" to "a".