How can I get her out of my life ?

Question

I have a very selfish mother in law . She only cares about her son . She always asks him questions abt me ..what I buy or do and she always imitates me and interferes in our life like hell 

She wants to go to every place we go to

She wants to prevent me to hang out with my relatives as she wants to be with her son and my husband does not want to upset her 

She always decides that she wants to travel with us and I am really sad 

As my husband sees that nothing will go wrong if she joins us !

She spends all her money on her look to be prettier than me in front of people 

She wants us to see her twice a week!!

She is cheating on her husband and I do not want to say that I have known THIS!!

How can i get her out of my mind 

Answer 1

Maybe they think you'll presently don't be a major part of their life in the event that you improve excessively. Possibly they feel like your improvement uncovered their own.

Answer 2

I think you should have a straight talk with your husband as he is a connection with you and your mother in law. You and your husband can have the best solutions after the discussion. 

Answer 3

Send a package to her husband with a note inside that says that she is cheating and also a loaded revolver.

Answer 4

Tell your husband to grow some balls and do what’s right by you, or leave him. He doesn’t want to upset her but he’s ok upsetting you? 🤨

Answer 5

The only way to get a mother-in-law out of your life is to divorce her adult child and never look back. Oh, you also can't be raising any of her grandchildren because in that case even a divorce won't keep her out of your life. 

Answer 6

Nice try... if this were only true. 

Answer 7

Unfortunately you must grin and cheese be an actress to keep the peace in other words go along with the program. Try ignoring mother-law, say "I love You" a lot,  or stay home more while husband visits.   

Answer 8

"my husband does not want to upset her"

And...this is your problem.  He doesn't seem to worry about upsetting you, does he?  You're married to a mama's boy, and this is hell on earth.  It was also a very bad choice on your part.  Early on, it can be easy to mistake a mama's boy for someone close to his mom, and this is understandable.  By the time a couple marries, though, each should know the other well enough to see the many red flags that pop up with this.  You ask how to get her out of your mind, but this is a strange way to put it.  What you REALLY want deep down is for him to put you first and her second.  This won't happen.

Since it doesn't sound like you have kids, my advice is divorce him.  This won't get better; in fact, as she ages, it will get worse.  Nobody wants to be a spouse's #2, since the whole point of marriage is to be #1.  

Answer 9

Your problem is  with your husband, not with his mother.  If you're unhappy about his MIL you need to communicate that to *him*.

Answer 10

You are the one giving this woman so much power. 

You do what you wish to do, let your husband do what he feels he needs to do....as he is obviously caught between two women who love him.  He is a part of your life, therefore so is his mom.

If you want alone time with him, let him know how important it is to you....not as a reaction to your mil, but simply because you want to spend time alone with him.  

This doesn't have to be an either/or situation, there is plenty of room for compromise.  You should be able live your life in peace without her interference, include your mil on occasion, maybe attempt to get to know her as a person, learn about her life, how she grew up, maybe what makes her this way....humanize her.  If you love your husband and he loves his mom, you need to respect that, even if she annoys the hell out of you.

You can't control others but you can certainly control your own attitude/perspective/bias and stop giving your thoughts so much power.