Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 month ago

Daughter won't have anything to do with me. ?

My childs mother always pushed me away, and made it hard for me to see my daugher. Last time I seen her was when she was 3, and now she is 19. 

I happen to run into her with her mom, and tired to get to know my daughter. She told me I am not her dad, that I am just a donor. That her dad is her mom's husband. He's been in ber life since she was 6. He is her dad. I said your mom made it hard for me, and she said you didn't fight for me, and shut the door and walked away. 

What can I do?

6 Answers

  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Yeah, she's probably wondering why you never took her mother to court to demand visitation or shared custody. She's not entirely wrong to not have paternal feelings for a man who didn't even bother to fight for their relationship. In her mind you likely allowed this just because you didn't want to pay child support. You reap what you sow. 

  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    not much you can do about it if she dont want to see you

  • T J
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    If you can prove that the child's mother did things, to keep you away, make copies and send them or hand them to your daughter,

  • 1 month ago

    That sucks, but if she doesn't want to initiate a relationship, there's not a lot you can do. Best you can do is tell her your door is always open if she changes her mind. 

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  • 1 month ago

    You can grow up and stop playing the victim here?

    I'm not saying your ex wasn't difficult, but you cannot lay the blame soley on her for you not being able to see your daughter! You easily could have taken your ex to court for 50/50 custody, but instead you elected to not take such action, one in which was your legal right to so. Also, you have had 16 years to be a part of your daughters life, not once in those 16 years did you ever reach out to her, that was a choice you soley made.

    She is right, you are NOT in any way her father! All you did was supply your ex your sperm, meaning you are in fact a sperm donor, you are not in any way or shape her father. It takes a real man to be a father, and her step-father is her real one, he is the one who has been there for her every step of the way and there for every milestone of her life.

    What can you do? Respect your daughters wishes to leave her alone! She has a good life, she doesn't need some selfish asshole coming in and causing all this un- necessary upheaval. If she wants to reach out to you, she knows how to find you, until then back off.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    You can stop making excuses for not being in your child's life.  I happen to think she's right.  Unless you went to Court REPEATEDLY and tried to get COURT ORDERED VISITATION, she's right.  You are no more and no less than a sperm donor.


    You ran into her ... and then she shut the door?  What?

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